barrio headline news for 05212020

Barrio headline news for 05212020.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news;

Barrio taverns take measures to get your drunk butt home;

Yesterday all 20 bars in the hood have hired Jacob Munoz. Basket making company to provide homemade baskets large enough to haul drunk person home. Not only drunks will qualified for this services also those persons that are ranting and raving drunk at bars. All bar owners agreed as a rule of thumb was that if someone couldn’t standup then it was time to go. A porter will be provided by the Munoz basket makers to all the bars that cover for their service. Oh by the way the porter will leave you a bill when you are dropped off at your home. Munoz told us que he hopes this new way to get drunks home will catch on and will open a whole lot of jobs in the hood.

Public notice on coffin for your love ones;

Yesterday Benny Soto owner of the only coffin maker in the hood. Told us to tell you all that if you expect to die sooner than later, to make sure you have a request as soon as possible. It is better to be prepared for that day now than later. The waiting period for coffin is about 10 days, due to the large number of register voters dying in the hood? Mr. Soto also told us que he is working on building cardboard hospital beds with metal railings that can be converted into coffins.  He estimates that these beds can hold a 450 pound person and will cost about $10 each. He is hoping that he gets national attending that could increase his booming business…

Vato men’s club opens up with new services;

 With the large increase of drive-thru services, the only gentlemen’s club named Vato’s men’s club will also  offering drive-thru pole dances and other entertainment in a makeshift outdoor space, according to the owner Mario G... Dancers were showered with bills or grabbed their tips using a trash picker to reach into vehicles as patrons enjoyed the performances from the safety of their cars. Furthermore a special customer drive thru can also can request an all nude drive-up strip teases. "Guests can drive up to the front door, and we are going to have dancers separated by the 6-foot separation rule, and (customers) can enjoy a totally nude show right from the seat of their car," Mario G. told us.

Ok Raza have a great day

hejola report for 0515/2020

Hejola report for 05142012./2020

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello como estan I am bill diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news;

Several cross dressers arrested at mother’s day dance.

Man accuse of telling tall tales, gets his butt kicked.

And finally mother day party went great.

But some good news, la familia Martinez annual mother’ day bash went great, about 3 persons attending this party which was an increase of about 33 percent increase compared to last years. The constable tells us que there was really no need for security forces to have attended this party.

After several hours of debating what he thought was texas history and personally stores, Bill Joe Morales got his butt knocked out for a few minutes when he told them that the Mexicans got what they had coming to and he felt que many Mexican still deserved what they got. Well that didn’t go to well con chingos de chicanos at a public meeting to discuss the history of the hood. Charges are pending.

Yesterday a small group of people blocked off part of third and wWells street without a permit. Once the constable found out after several call he went over and noticed some kind of street party was going on. Once he approach the group, a small fight got started where several men had several other men on the ground . Once the constable was able to break it up , he arrested several vato’s dress like women and several women dress like men. He didn’t ask too many questions but did take the whole tribe in and asked questions later.

Ok raza have a great weekendd

barrio headline news for o5112020.

Hejola report for 05112015/2020.

Ccwhnn.

Kingsville, TX. Hello again I am Bill Diaz, con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio member wins barrio medical award.

Barrio Caldo reactor poses no danger.

And finally youth programs end sooner than predicted.

The summer program planned for this summer was cancelled before it even started says one of the community leaders. We just had so many complaints about this program que we figured que it would be easier to just cancel the darn program than mess with it and the parents involved. The program would have allowed your child from the ages of 3 to 45 years old to learn a trade, such as but not limited to picking up trask, recycling, painting, building small and big things and much more fun. Sorry kids.

Yesterday afternoon at our Cruz roja community center an award was given to Chon Mundado Munoz, the most predigests medical Neurology award for studying drunken men and women brains in the hood. He also added que he urges barrio folks with suspected concussions to wait a few days after they deceased before calling him up to research their brains. I just can’t go in your head with my small hammer and start hammering away, you know it could hurt and not only that, I won’t have my medical degree until 10 years from now. Congratulations vato.

Yesterday el senior Tyler Mary Moore Gomez, barrio owner of the only Caldo reactor in the county, announced that the reactor sucrose fission facility posed little risk of failure and or danger to the folks living around the corner of third and wells. He told this reporter que lots of barrio members were concern about their safety but he promise que if such danger were to be present he would give us a call. By the way el caldo maker, is the largest maker of homemade caldo in a can, The world has ever seen.

Ok raza have a great day.

05062020 barrio headline news

Barrio headline news for 05062020.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news;

Barrio tamale workers on strike;

Yesterday we found out, but with no proof that homemade tamale workers went on strike last week. The number of persons needed to make tamales is around 3 to 4 persons; ranging from mother’s, daughters, grandmothers, great grandmothers, and in some cases friends. As an unknown fact that this has happened is still pending on some kind of proof.

Social gathering;

Late last night several crack house were raided due to the fact that there were too many people at one location. The constable tells us que we don’t mine if you are doing drugs or not but you have to keep the limit of folks reasonable. Charges were filed and all the persons were released.

Barrio leader does not promote drugs usage!

Tomas Trumpas announced today that he is in no position to determine if drugs are good or bad, but did indicate that if you do drugs they are bad for you regardless of what drug you use. He said regardless what the drug is for they are bad for you and you should not use them unless you buy them from Trumps Apothecary (a person who prepared and sold medicines and drugs).

And finally last hope;

Have you ever lost hope on people and things? Have you ever wonder why you depend on people or things that you don’t know how to use? Well we have an answer; get rid of that stuff you don’t need and things that you don’t use or need.  We live in a society that requires us to use and buy stuff or even stay up the family next door. Those days are over now and you may return to the way you grew up with; nothing.

And one more finally note about our barrio leader’;

La chica de chica Nuevo Leon, a barrio health experts have claimed que Tomas Trumpas is a paranoid and delusional”, and said it was her “ethical responsibility” to warn the barrio public about the “dangers” Mr Trumpas psychological state poses to the whole hood.

barrio stock market report for 05012020

barrio stock market report for 05012009/2020

Barrio stock market report for 05012009.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,tx. Hello again I am urbano yosabatodo con this week’s barrio stock market report. Last week we informed you that we were going to include the prices of pinto beans and rice.
Now let’s get to that award winning barrio stock market report :
Los taquitos, ended the week at $1.50 each, coffee is extra. But could go up.
Los tamales took a dive up on that steady pass this week, but ended the week at $6.00 a dozen.
Las tortillas, the price is going up. Las tortillas $1.75 a pack. Think corn tortillas? Yea.
La barbacoa de caberas ended the week higher than last week, $7.00 a lb. llama barbeque at $2.50 lbs. it’s the solution.
Las empanadas are sky high, ending the week at $.99 each. Pesse hejola.
cheap beer is cheaper but steady at $1.39. real good.
a bag of five pound bag of rice is going for $11.50.
a bag of 5 pound bag of pinto beans is going for $2.25.
Barrio want ads:
#5698: for sale used shoes and tennis shoes, size 14.
#8954: still looking for a young woman to live with older man, will provide maid outfit. Weekly salary.
#9862: we still have some baby now big easter chickens and ducks for sale, some still in good health, make offer.
#7652: womens underwear for sale, one size fits all, different colors and different types, make offer for the whole lot.

Barrio realtors : no one has any lots for sale this week.