hejola report for 06142017

Hejola report for 06152017.

Cchwnn

Kingsville, Texas. hello raza how are we doing? I am David polar Bear Duran con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio leader brother mental ill.

Yesterday afternoon  barrio leader Trumpas younger brother was arrested from acting and looking stupid as he tried to make a get away on his three wheeler bicycle! A report had been filed by a unknown person saying that they had seen his brother LUPito Trumpas riding his bicycle in his underwear and when confronted by the constable  he told him catch if you can,can, can …. It only took ten seconds to arrest that poor fool.

 

Ten new residents move into the hood.

It seems that folks haven’t learn that we can still have farm animals in hood.  So knowing that la familia Davis moved ten new dairy cows into their back yard hoping to see if they sell some of the milk. Barrio leaders were real worried now that more farm animals are moving into the hood.

 

And finally more barrio bad news.

Now that the hot weather has moved in, city officals are a bit worried that barrio resident need to make sure they pay their bill on time if not the city is going to shut down all the electric power to that side of town, something similar to what happen last year at this same time. Barrio members have more than ten window air conditioner and doors open and window up that don’t help their electric bill. So the city has send out a notice to all those, pay or shut it down…

Ok have a great hot summer.

hejola report for 06142017

Hejolia report for 06142017.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, tx. Hello again and como estan todos? I am Jonathon Barrios, Well we are here and you are there and we do have some updates on our special reports from our alley reporters “el ojo “ barrio private eye y Johnnie El Quemon ..

NOW with an update on the case of “on trail to the truth”, here is el ojo…

Hello my raza, I am “el ojo”. First of all thanks to all the folks that use highway 281 north, to all those that love to use their car horns, hey man don’t honk, give me a ride, pincha raza…oops.

Well we have been walking around here in san anto, first we stopped at the historical San Jose mission, and walked around for awhile looking for esta short vato with a fat face, but no luck, just found old stuff and lots of tourist. Buy used stuff, reminded me of my house, you know, I bet I can make lots of money selling that stuff.

Second, we managed to get to the Alamo and were hoping to see old guys with young chicks. Again no luck, puro old people, walking around, taking pictures of old stuff ….we did ask a cop, if he knew, you know who, and if he had any information about you know what… he said, let me see your papers boy, pesse hejolia, I guess that’s what I get.

Third, since we had so spare changes we when over to the 5 and dime store across the street and killed so time there, looking at all the stuff made in china. And then we walked over to the majestic theatre.. wow, man it has changed since the last time I was there in 1958.

And finally we managed to get to Breaking Bridge park. Stop there for a while looking around for a short guy with a fat face and young chicks,,, hejolia there was a bunch of them.. but none had since esa vato they call the voic... , who likes little girls,,,,,we wanted to hear. But we did see many of my primitive relatives at the zoo.. swear to god I honest though I saw mi brother  there, behind so small cage….eating some peanuts……

Well the end results was, we did find some interesting facts, not one no short dudes knew anything about what we were talking about. Second we will be walking around the city court yard waiting to see who might know anything about this injustice. Our next area will be the river walk, be looking for us….back to Jonathon..

Gee thanks El ojo and be very careful on your on going investigation on you know who…. Now with Johnnie El quemon on the story of “ the underground tag snatchers/ tears…

Hello again, here we are at la pulga en Alamo, TX and man como are things without labels here. We are sure that many of us can be blame for this and then try to push them off on us…. Yea we know who you are and trying to resale this stuff …oh yea…well its going to come to a big stop … you hear me girl … we know where you live and do … and the big man is watching you….

Bye. Well, well Johnnie, we didn’t think you would take this so serious esa, anyhow be careful there in the valley and keep us informed….there you have our investigation on matters that don’t matter to any one matter…

westside warriors news network for 07092017

Westside warrior news network for 07092017

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx Hello again folks is Lewis mojo Lewis with our award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio sancho clause shot,

Barrio streetlighst are not working,

And finally barrio lotto leaders arrested.

It seems that if things could go wrong, they will. Well that is the issue con our barrio lotto, I am sure many were hoping to get a chance on winning or getting some free bucks from our barrio lotto, well it’s not going to happen. Late last night real county cops and city police along con el constable cadena busted Manuel Vela the acting director for the barrio lotto on charges of steal barrio funds, Spending barrio funds, misleading board of directors for lotto, and losing almost all the lotto funds on gambling, and traveling charges with no proof he went anywhere, and buying personal stuff. His court hearing is pending.

In the last twelve days there has not been one single barrio street light working starting from the Westside along the north bound railroad tracks, all the way down third street up to the corner of Richard street and down towards 6 th street. City official from across the tracks have told Westside resident that local taxes and other stuff are suppose to pay for such city services but since no one on our side of the tracks have not paid their yearly taxes, the city took it on their own to shut all city street light power off until some folks down here pay up.

And finally, our man sancho clause was shot three times late last night when somebody was trying to car jack his car that looks like  santa clause sled which he welded onto his 1979 ford whatever. His conditions are not known at this time but our constable cadena is asking for your help, if anyone has seen or heard anything dealing with this matter please contact us..

Ok raza there you have and have a great tejano day

hejola reprot for 06082017

Hejola report for 06082017.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello once again I am bill diaz, Now for our award winning barrio headline news:

Two get arrested outside dance hall,

 Five honor over saving several chickens,

 And finally the barrio vato goes to college.

Just yesterday morning a few vato’s who managed to get their g.e.d. during the summer were accepted at our local community college as freshmen. But the sad part of this whole trip was how expensive it is to go to college now a days. Since both vato’s live below the poverty level they were able to get some free aid but were concern con tantos loans they have to borrow in order to pay for this ordeal. We will keep track on this vatos and their adventure in college.

Now for other news, five men and women were honor late last night at our barrio community cruz rojo center on their brave efforts on saving a bunch of chickens on the express way from getting run over. Si, says el constable cadena que estos folks were on the express trying to round up estos pollos and nearly got run over. At that time they were arrested for being on the express way but charges were later dropped. Good job raza.

And finally, it started as a contest for the best polka dancing couple and ended up as a free for all outside the dance hall when a few contestants bumped into each other during the contestants. El constable is not sure how or why but it seems que looked like when one many a dance turn con su partner que it knocked down several of the other dancers. Chinga and than chit hit the fan. The arrested dancers and a few on lookers were arrested.

Ok raza there you have it for today, counting down towards the end of the year. oh yea.

hejola report for 06072017

Hejolia report for 06072017.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again raza I am bill Diaz con todays award winning barrio headline news

Barrio leaders warn about wearing sombreros.

Thomas Trumpas announced today que he wants all male members of the barrio to start wearing sombreros and not cowboy hats. He said that by wearing sombreros it makes it easier to see who is legal and illegal persons living in the hood. Look let’s make sure we know who you are, where you are, and where we can find you if needed to. Some barrio members are calling him a Trumpas a hypocrite when he wears a cowboy hat. When asked why he wore a cowboy hat instead of a sombreros he said it feels good to be an American!

Increase of cowboy’s hat sales increase.

It seems that barrio members are not buy the request by our barrio leader to wear sombreros, but instead have increased the sales of cowboy hats and are not going to comply with his request. Wow we have never seen such an increase on a certain item in a long time says martin lopez. You just can’t beat that when we have sold more than five a day.

And finally a round up gone bad.

Thomas trumpas surpassed el constable this weekend when he tried to round up at least 10 dogs, 4 cats, 22 cows, 15 ducks, 33 chickens, by using his own police force made up of 10 dogs, 4 cats, 22 cows, 15 ducks, and 33 chickens. He did notices que his own forces equal to the same amount of things that he wanted to round up, and stopped by el constable trying to round up 10 dogs, 4 cats, 22 cows, 15 ducks, and 32 chickens. Please note that one of the chickens refuse to be part of any roundup lead by Trumpas!

Ok raza don’t forget to get your sombrero!

hejola report for 06012017

Hejola report for 06012017.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello como estan, I am bill diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Family Gomez took all the cookies, more for us?

Reunion of semi-pro baseball team.

And finally few tejanos pissed off.

Today was nothing different from other days, when we have single tejano’s and their supporters, not athletic supporter but individuals that drink from the cup pissed off when they were asked why  their  group was wanting to hold a secret gathering to determine the future of la onda tejana; which they felt they represented. Many in the hood told us que estos ways, hadn’t done nothing only benefit from their own ideology ideas and their needs only.  A special barrio meeting will be held to discuss this matter in 2033, make sure to attend this session, that’s if you are still alive.

This weekend will mark the 30th anniversary that Los Amigos semi- pro baseball team last played.  This weekend these old goats will join together and will play against a team much older than they are. The team that has agreed to show up for this challenge has yet not mention, how many team members they will have to face Los Amigos. The team captain for  the challengers Benny Perez, age 82, say que he is really sure que his team will be there and has assure us que someone is going to get there butt whipped.   Good luck guys and make sure you bring your diaper and your will with you.    

 Yesterday la familia Gomez were arrested when they determine que they were only interested in their needs and not the rest of the hood. Its really sad, says el comparde Juan Perez, one of the families que didn’t get any cookies,  que esta familia, Gomez, took all the cookies from the cookie jar and didn’t leave any for the rest of us. This type of selfness is what cause us not have faith in bull shitter, wearing Tejano clothing.

Ok raza and to all los gringitos that have learn the game, have a great Tejano day way…goat roper…