hejola report for 07182013

Hejola report for 07182013.
Cchwnn
Once again mi raza como estan todos, I am bill Diaz con today’s hejola report. Well as we all expected it, el taconaso dance hall went off in a real big bang. It was a sellout crowd and eager for that cyber tejano music. All the groups showed up and did a great job, making us aware of why they are barrio music award winners. And now back to the today’s hejola report:
El compadre watches over his seven daughters,
La commadre scalps el primo in trying to style his hair,
And finally juanito Johnson gets 30 days in jail for his action inside the courtroom.
El primito juanito Johnson got 30 extra days added to his nine-month community control sentences at a hearing Monday morning. It seems que juanito apparently didn’t like that so many of his lawyers motions were being denied by the justice of the peace, suddenly reached over and slapped and began strangling his lawyer, until court officers pulled him off.
In other news la commadre was also giving some type of community services sentence for partially scalping el primo. It seems que el primo was convinced by la commadre to try and style his hair con un pincha power drill, a technique he saw on TV. La commadre was sentenced due to the fact que she knew que it was a bad idea because she had previously screwed up her own hair trying it out. Pesse hejola.
And finally it was good to see el senior don goyetio Moreno y su seven daughters at our dance last night. Don goyetio is known for watching over his seven beautiful daughters at ever function the family attends. Don goyetio is kind of old fashion where any man wanting to dance con su daughters must ask him for permission there at the dance hall. Our records show que don goyetio has been doing this for over twenty-five years. His oldest daughter is 396 years of age and his youngest daughter is 27 years of age. There is really no plans in the future for anyone of this girls getting married. Ole well.
Ok raza there you have it for today, I am bill diaz and have a great tejano day.

westinghouse barrio mall newsletter for 07072013

Westinghouse barrio mall newsletter for 07172013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello I am Gloria Guerra con todays mall newsletter. Well since public and higher education schools are getting ready to start within a few weeks, don’t you think its time to put stuff on lay a way? Now for that great lay a way plan here is our own lay a way a guy Alcardio Samudio, con that report.

 

Si Gloria a lay a way plan has always been a good deal for many in the hood. Did you know que at one time a lay a way plan was the only way we could afford to buy stuff for Christmas and of course birthdays and of course the first class days. I remember when we were children we just couldn’t want to get all that new clothes for school that were lay a way for several months. Shut up, Christmas was more exciting. So the moral of the question is are you ready to lay a way all those special things our children and in some case you will need?

 

Ok thanks Al, I will make a note of that for our Christmas lay a way plan. Now let’s go to our consumer person el general Fideo Vermicelli, si raza Fideo here con how to save on that lay a way plan. Look why would you spend chingos de money on a pair of new jeans that look like the ones I wore in 1960? Just wash them and put them in a used major department store box and acting like you bought them there. No one will notice, believe they won’t, you know why? Because its very rare that you buy anything for anyone. Now back to Gloria.

And now about that Tejano gay bar that they plan on opening here at the mall> thanks for that report.

Gee thanks for that weak advise, hejola, I am Gloria Guerra have a great Tejano day.

hejola report for 06162013

Hejola report for 07162013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, tx. Hello I am David Duran con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Gay tejanos rally goes wrong.

Barrio prepare for a new communications systems plan for the hood.

And finally some good news.

Well the good news is that the city will allow, again that the 1959 xmas decorations will be left up till the end of the year, due to the fact que all this xmas lights have decrease the  crime rate in the hood. We see qreat thing happening with this xmas lights have done for our hood. And not only that but has made the hood more of a jolly place to live.

After the long three block march, held yesterday, 20 or so gay tejanos were rushed to st.paul’s medical center located at the Westinghouse barrio mall after they were over heated by being out in the sun that long. One of the workers at the medical center told us que eso ways need to get in better shape if they plan on marching up and down certain streets for certain causes, during the summer time. He also suggested que they shouldn’t be wearing all that Tejano stuff on especial in the middle of the day, it’s just darn to hot.

Yesterday barrio leaders and city leaders are looking into allowing “half smoke will travel” a permit to operate its new communication system in the hood starting 2030. This new way to communicate would allow people to send smoke signals all over the hood without having those high price rates that other communicates systems charge. The owner, Long Winded Gomez tells us que it’s been used for years and it doesn’t have to have any back up data, just light it up and away you go sending signals. Both groups will determine if such a communicates is really needed.

Ok jolly wally, have a great day, I am  David Duran from Fond Du Lac.

hejola report for 07152013

Hejola report for 07152013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, tx. Hello again I am bill diaz con todays award winning barrio hejola report. Now for that report:

 

Barrio home care company busted,

New drug store busted,

And finally new streets are planned.

 

Some one in the hood heard that the city founders are planning in rebuilding all the streets in el barrio. How and when it was not made clear but we do know que we heard this before. Oh who will pay for it was not discussed and when?

 

In other news Garcia’s drug store was busted shortly after it had opened its doors right across the street from the mall. El constable cadena tells us que the drug store didn’t have all the permits or the licenses that were required. After talking with the owner, mr. Garcia, he told us que all he wanted to do was help people get well. Oh well we really are not sure when the drug store will have another grant opening.

 

And finally pat’s home care company shut its doors down yesterday after noon when we found out that it was an escort services for old folks. It seen que pat the owner had hired a bunch of x stripers and hired them to care for old men and women. Well after some of the kin folks of some of the old folks realized que they were coming up short con su month money. They filed a complaint at the court house across the tracks. Charges are pending during this investigation.

 

Well folks there you have it I am bill diaz till the chit hit the fan.

hejola report for 07112013

Hejola report  for 07112013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,texas. Hello there my friends and what in world wide of sports are we doing today, I am Frankie tuxedo Zuniga con today’ award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio members prepare for a long hot summer.

Increase of ice block on the move.

And finally some good news.

Yesterday we were told that several Tejano organizations have agreed to acknowledge gay Tejano artists. This is great news for the only Tejano bar “ two tons of Fun”. Easy Bunny, the manager of this bar tells us now there they can bring in real Tejano music into their bar. Its great move we think. Now we can all  see our compadres y commadres getting down con few good polkas.. oh yea. Keep it gay vato.

 

Keep it Cool, a new barrio ice making company is hitting it big this past few weeks, with their old fashion but new trend on keep cool this summer. The deal is that this company has re-cycle old fashion water cooler and has convert them into modern day air conditions with a catch to it. You have to add a block of ice, which keeps the air it blows cool. The owners tell us that that block of ice can last up to two or three hours. Now the plus behind this is that you can also water your yard with the melted ice. “ keep it cool” tell us that blocks of ice are going fast and are still at that give away price.

 

We just informed que the complete Westside of our hood was in the edge of night? That means that if some of the barrio folks don’t make payments on their past electric bills the whole darn Westside might just get shut down, says el electric guy Ben Cases. Yes, he told us que some folks like that air conditioner but forget que some one got to pay for that luxury .

 

Ok raza have a cool day and stay cool because if you aint cool you aint shit.

hejola report for 07102013

Hejola report for 07102013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, tx. Como estan again I am bill diaz and we are back from that short long nass vacation que we spend too little too much. But we are back in full swing and now let’s get to that award winning headline news:

Barrio man fakes heart attack and arrested.

Several arrested after barrio Ex, deliver drugs.

And finally, barrio elder gets stuck under her wheelchair.

La senora maria ruiz somehow fell down and brought her wheelchair down with her, when she reached over to get her pill bottle, managed to tip over her wheel chair and fell on top of her. After several days of not answering her phone, her relatives came over to see if she was alright and found her pinned down. El constable tells us que she will be alright. No charges will be filed against the wheel chair.

First of all, seemed que two vatos didn’t realize que you could get into lots of trouble by shipping drugs via barrioEX delivery service. Well known for its great barrio services, it seemed que barrio EX made a small mistake and delivered the 100 pounds of weed to the wrong address. Once el constable was called in, he and his barrio forces 666 posed as barrioEX employess intended to deliver the stuff, they arrested two vatos who’s names are being withheld..

And finally, It seems que el compadre hector manula cantu just don’t know when to stop his bull shit. It seems que el compadre was arrested at the Westinghouse barrio mall for faking his 33nd heart attack in ten days. In doing this he has avoid paying a shit load off restaurant bills  and taxi fares. El constable cadena was going to let him go at his last attack but it seemed que los vatos loco volunteer firefighters recognized him from his last faked heart attack. El compadre is facing some serious charges.

Well raza its good to be back, and rolling again.

hejola report for 07052013

Hejola report for 04052013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, texas. Now here is Bill Diaz. And hello again raza como estan todo? Now for our award winning barrio headline news.

City leaders make decision on our side of the track about Christmas decorations for the summer.

Westinghouse barrio mall looking for new stores,

And finally barrio constable looking for person’s to claim arrested barrio members still locked up from new year’s party bust.

 

But first of all, The city leaders from across the tracks have decided to leave the Christmas decoration all year round at our side of the tracks. This decision came after last week’s meeting. One leader said it’s cheaper to leave them up and instead of taking them down. Another leader said, we aren’t too worried about them decoration over there anyhow.””Them decorations are from the 1978-year anyhow”.

Gloria Guerra the Westinghouse barrio mall,Managers told us que they were looking for a few new stores to open at the mall. So if you are interested in opening a store or something like that, just call 361-558-2263,and ask for Gloria. By the way make sure and read “la voz del Westinghouse barrio newsletter” every Wednesday, on all the updates on special and sales.

And finally el constable cadena tells us que he still has 28 barrio members locked: 12 Hispanics, 9 gringos, 5 African Americans, and the balance he was not really sure what they were! Or where from?  You might remember que these were the folks that we arrested at that New Years Eve party bust on new years eve. El constable tells us que only 3 persons have been claimed since Sunday.

He is real worried que if these folks don’t get claimed soon, he might have to claim them on his income tax this year 2012. He told us que he was lucky que he busted them on the 31st. of December and not on the 1st. of Jan. 2013, (just for the record neither the county nor the city reimburse el constable for providing for detainees, waiting to be released or transferred.) el constable by law is allowed to establish a providers fee per detainee and is allowed by law to set a basic fee per detainee on a daily bases while been locked up.

 

Ok raza have a great Tejano day.