hejola report for 10312012

 

 

Hejola report for 10312012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello raza como esta. I am bill diaz con take that mask off baby. Now for our award

Winning barrio headline news:

Few tejanos say we are smarter than that, tamale hater.

Barrio zombies not funny, says el constable cadena.

And finally trick or treat commadres.

El compadre Henry Garcia was arrested this morning for having his wife locked up in family                                                                                bathroom for at least three days. His excuse was que when Halloween comes around she wants                                                                                   to walk around in her kinky outfit that he bought her ten years ago. El compadre was charged and released.

Yesterday evening el constable cadena had a press hearing to explain que there are some real looking zombies living in the hood and that many residents should take this seriously. He told the group of reporters and on lookers que you all should keep your doors locked and windows shut between The hours of 8a.m. to 5p.m. after that they folks won’t have a place to park their cars.. one of the unlooked asked the constable if he was on drugs..pesse hejola.

Yesterday at the last confrontation debate between “esta vato loco” vs. Russell Rufus Redneck, a bunch of Tejano questioned Russell when he told the group que his quest was still to establish a law not to allow barrio members to make homemade tamales but supported the idea that only private owned companies should market them, period. This drew lots of negative comments from most of the Tejanos attending the debate. One Tejano was quoted in saying esta vato esta loco. The meeting ended sooner than later when a few tejanos want to kick Russell ass out of the hood. No charges nor complaints were filed against them tejanos.

Ok raza be careful and be wish.

westinghouse barrio mall newsletter for 10302012

Westinghouse barrio mall newsletters for 10302012.

Cchwnn.

 

(Mysterious voice) now here is Gloria Guerra:

 

Kingsville,texas. Thank you again, mi raza Como estan todos? Well its 24 hours from now and we are already geared up for this festival here at the Westinghouse barrio mall. We lots of things to cover today, so let’s get right to it.

 

First of all let’s go to our new and improved CONJUNTO DANCE LAND con our own conjunto correspondent, that guy que like to dance taqucha style Johnnie el Quemon.

 

Hello again raza, I am Johnnie, standing in front of our new and improved conjunto dance land. Starting tomorrow will be the start of our long weekend puro bailes and party. Here is the great line up for this week and weekend.:

 

THURSDAY NIGHT:

 

3:00pm to 5:00pm> EL CONJUNTO DE MARTHA GARZA.

 

6:00pm to 8:00pm>. el LEFT PATCH ZORRIO Y LOS ZOMBIES  DE LA JOYA, TX.

 

9:00pm to 11:00pm> GLORIA big mama BIGGER Y SU BIG MAMA biggers.

 

FRIDAY NIGHT :

 

6:pm to 8:0pm> la movida de Federico hinojosa de Laredo, tex.

 

9:00pm to 11:00pm> Bucky Lopez from grupo 'Los tejano bucks'.

 

SATURDAY ALL DAY:

 

12:00pm to 2pm> Los crazy dudes from NY, NY.

 

3:00pm to 5:pm> Harrycore Ramirez del group hardcore Mary u su conjunto de                  

       corpitos./

 

7:00pm to 9:00pm > Janie y Las Masotas.

 

10:00pm to 12:00am> Siloma Griffin ruelas del group siloma del valle.

 

And finally Sunday afternoon :

 

2:00pm to 4:00pm> DON PEDRO “el pelon cara de nopal”.

 

6:00pm to 8:00pm> Cristina y los Cream Puffs.

 

 Si raza as you can see we have a heck of a line up, so have a nice day and make sure that if you are drinking do drive, the county, the city and the state needs the money and now back to gloria.

 

Ok thanks Johnnie. Ok raza, now lets go to our CONA LOZANO CASH AND CARRY SPORTS COMPLEX, with an update, with our own sports guy FRANKIE TUXEDO ZUNIGA.

 

Si gloria I am frankie standing here in front of our sports complex. We are still accept teams for this year’s “2012 EL TAQUCHA FANTASY FOOTBALL CHAMPIONSHIP TO BE HELD IN TWO WEEKS.  So make sure an email your team names: cchwnn@netscape.net. Now back to Gloria.

 

Ok thanks Frankie, now let’s go to our main stage here at the mall and lets go to mr turkey our mall mascot.

 

Mr. Turkey: gobble goblle goblele al eoathl e.

 

Ok thank mr turkey, oh he said that this weekend we have lots and lots of cheap ass things for sale here at the mall and make sure and lay a way for that Christmas day.

 

Ok raza I am Gloria Guerra have a great holiday.

hejola report for 10292012

Hejola report for 11292012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello raza I am bill diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news;

More good news adds to the old bad news.

Sock dance schedule for this weekend.

And finally winter baseball brings out the same bull chitter.

Yesterday  at one of our young baseball game a group of unsportmanship parents and coaches were allowed to enter this year baseball classic, in the past this same parents and team members had been barred from coming over to our side of the tracks to play ball. But after a few inns that seems to be going well an umpire made a good call but against estos ways. After 30minutes  of complainting about calls and pitches and far and foul balls, the baseball committee agree to give this a- holes their entre fee back and told them to get the hell out this park and don’t look back until the door hits on the way out. no charges will be filed.

El centro for old chicanos will be holding their annual sock dance at the same location they have held it for the last 30 years. But this year a few rules have been changed, one was que you will have be at least 67 years old to get in and you must be able to dance a few songs, or you will asked to leave the hall.

Yesterday la senoria Mary Perez was awarded $1000 from a contest she entered. After her name was posted inside our barrio newspaper of when and why the award was going to be given to her. That’s the good news, now the bad news. When she showed up to the award center, almost all her 250 relatives and some she hadn’t seen in years showed up to see if they were going to be given of the piece of the award, very disapppointed on the results when it was announced que she was only going to get $15 and some changes due to the fact que she owned money to the government. Mary told us que she was glad to have won the award and now owes less that she did.

 

Ok raza play ball and have fun.

barrio stock market report for 10262012

BARRIO STOCK MARKET REPORT CON URBANO YOSABATODO.

10262012.

 

ONCE again here is urbano, como estan todos mi big spenders? While other stock exchanges and dealers are free to trade con those listed stocks, in practice, brokerage firms route most of their orders to that other exchange. But for best execution at the best price here en el barrio, our barrio stock market has been rated number one by some big ass spenders here in the hood.

 

As the data throughout this section shows, the barrio stock market  continually provides the best prices, the most liquidity, the lowest trading costs, the lowest volatility and excellent transaction speed and certainty in our hood, how about yours?

 

Lets now go to our award winning barrio stock market report:

 

Los taquitos:

 

La familia Gonzales owners of las tortillas del hood announced a  jointly  efforts to strengthen making of taquitos and will improve its research analysts and initial public offerings. These initiatives are in support of a new joint regulatory initiative among the still existing taco stands  and those that make taquitos at home. El barrio Exchange Commission has  address these critical areas before. Los taquitos were down this week at $1.10 each and coffee is extra.

 

Los tamales:

 

This week it was announced by our own barrio tamale broker manuel Gonzales que we will be seeing some major changes inside el tamale world. With the decrease of corn leaves and a mild summer their should really be no major concerning  this matter. Los tamales ended the week at $5.50 a dozen a bit higher than a few weeks ago.

 

Las empanadas:

 

El barrio community gardens will hold its annual barrio meeting at our community center this weekend to discuss this winters cropies and how much our their products will be used this coming xmas and new years. Its easy to say que they the makers of las empanadas are willing to use our product but  are they willing to pay the price. Las empandas  are more filling than before which was a great victory for los barrio consumers. Las empanadas ended the week at all high $.65 cents each.

 

La barbacoa de cabazea:

 

Well since the creation of several llama farms and the increase of feral hogs, many barrio farmers had dropped their concerns con esa mad hog and cow diseases muchos de los barrio members have really cut down on eating barbacoa de cabazea.  La barbacoa ended the week at an all time high of $6.50 a lbs.

 

Las tortillas:

 

Wow man have you seen the price of this circular produce. My god tortillas have gone up so high on price que many are wondering if the modern chicana is going back to the old days of making their own tortillas at home. Las tortillas ended the week at all time high of $1.35 a dozen. Pesse hejola.

 

Cheap beer:

 

Well since football season is back and los cowboys have been winning some games muchos store owners tell us que they are selling beer likes its going out of style. Cheap beer ended the week at $2.99 a six pack.

 

 

Well raza there you have it for today, I am urbano yosabatodo. Have a great tejano day.

hejola report for 10252012

Hejola report for 10252012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello again raza how are we today I am bill diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news. For those that don’t understand us please don’t try. Now for that headline news:

Barrio store owner fakes robbery.

Barrio man falls two floors and only breaks two legs.

And finally barrio man busted con chingos de grass.

After a routine traffic stop, alma flores was arrested late Saturday nite and seized about 35 pounds of marijuana from her car, after she for some reason was unable to avoid crashing into the constable cruiser, which he had blocked the single lane street while investigating an accident at the corner of third and wells. Charges will be filed this morning.

It seems que little David little was trying to break into his friend apartment by climbing on to second floor balcony but slip and flew on his head. By the time los vatos locos volunteer fire fighters got to the scene, the real ambulance had already taken little to a hospital across the track. It just so happen que he broke both legs,Charges will be filed against mr.little for trespassing and robbery and extra fee’s for the ambulance and county and city sub charges. Chinga.

And finally,Yesterday morning el senor pedro Gomez owner of Gomez bakery got one of  his friend ben diaz to beat him  up and steal $5000, from him. It was all a fake says el constable cadena who arrived at the scene of the crime. When the constable was searching the area he noticed that the store had a survival video. After the constable reviewed the film it was determine que el senor Gomez y el senor diaz had all entered the store together and noticed how Gomez had assisted diaz con the money. Charges are pending for these two men.

Well there you have and make sure to submit your mascot name to us as soon as possible. I am bill diaz.

barrio zodiac signs

2011 barrio zodiac signs by Maria la Vandia.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,tx. Heaveno, Maria la Vandia con el barrio New Zodiac signs that have been assigned to your birthday. This of course is going to cause so many problems, for raza that thought they knew their signs and dress accordingly. So birth stones and dress codes will be required to change if you still want to follow such a thing. So here are the changes:
The old, than the new, and now the new barrio sign:
1.Birthdays Dec. 22 thur Jan. 19 was Capricon, than 2011 became Sagittaris , now barrio sign Spaghetti O.
2.Birthdays Jan. 20 thur Feb. 18 was Aquarius than 2011 became Capricon, now barrio sign Car Hubcap.
3. Birthdays Feb. 19 thur March 11 was Pisces than 2011 became Aquarius, now barrio sign a bajo sexto.
4. Birthdays March 12 thur April 18 was Aries than 2011 became Pisces, now barrio sign Accordion .
5. Birthdays for April 19 thru May 21 Taurus, than 2011 became Aries, now barrio sign flat tire.
6. Birthdays from May 21 thru June 20 was Gemini, than 2011 became a Taurus, now barrio sign set of drums.
7. Birthdays from June 21 thru July 22 was Cancer , than 2011 became Gemini, now barrio sign headphones.
8. Birthdays from July 23 thru August 22 was Leo, than 2011 became cancer, now barrio sign taqucha.
9. Birthdays from August 23 thru Sept. 22 was Virgo, than 2011 became Leo, now barrio sign Keg of beer.
10. Birthdays from Sept. 23 thru Oct. 22 was a Libra, than 2011 became a Virgo, now barrio sign Screen Door.
11. Birthdays from Oct.23 thru Nov. 21 was a Scorpio, than 2011 became a Libra, now barrio sign is Cockroach.
12. Birthdays from Nov. 22 to Dec. 21 was a Sagittarius, than 2011 became a Scorpion, now barrio sign is the latter.
All this changes come because one of the smart guys here in the in the hood told us que the earth has moved from its axels, heck and we still thought that he still lived at the corner of third and wells.
Anyhow raza please mark this day as a new date. I am Maria la Vandia, good day.

hejola report for 10242012

Howdy hejola report for 10242012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Howdy partner, I am country pancho con my story for today. You know Daniel our creator, created me a few years back, but that’s another story, now for our award winning barrio headline news:

Comparde moreno arrested for having naked dolls and women’s underwear.

Sad news, el compadre billy “el pescado” garica killed.

And finally, la commadre Viola Munoz big breast win again.

Yesterday morning at our barrio justice of the peace office, reversed the charges of the only barrio pinup model viola munoz, who had been found guilty of knock and kicking a round hole in the backdoor of her ex-lover Ricardo Barrientez apartment so she could break in and scream at his lazy ass. Ms. Munoz had appealed her conviction to the justice of the peace, claiming that Ricardo Barrientez, had made the hole himself. And that she had evidence that she could never have squeezed through it anyhow, she claimed that her breasts were too darn big. After the judge look over the evidence, she apparently won the day, by creating enough reasonable doubt to overturn the verdict.

 

Billy el pescado Garcia, el only barrio fisherman was killed late last night at our local fishing pond, when he yanked his fishing line too darn quick, that caused his 5 ounce lead sinker to propel out of the water  and drove it right into his forehead, penetrating his brain. He was rushed to st. pauls medical center but was dead on arrival, right after los vatos locos volunteer firefighter pulled the lead out of his head. Oh by the way the fish he caught will be returned back to the pond.  Chinga.

 And finally,Yesterday afternoon el compadre Moreno, was arrested just outside the Westinghouse barrio mall parking lot were mall officials spotted a bunch of pornographic magazines in backset of his automobile, along con chingos de womens tongs, and underwear and a whole lot of that new barrio toy doll “ maria la vandia”naked  sat in the back sit. Charges will be filed.

Well there you have folks, we are counting down towards this year’s tejano roots awards and we are hoping that we will be asked this year to present an award. Fingers cross and candles lid.

hejola report for 10232012

Hejola report for 10232012.

Cchwnn

Kingsville,tx.

Hello again I am bill diaz con todays hejola  report for this beautiful October day. For some reason or another and increase of marijuana arrests this past few weeks has the whole hood nervous. Many are wondering if thisa  new wave of arrested  are based on that “let me put the finger on you committee” vows to get rid of marijuana out of our hood. Oh well we will see.

 

Now for our awarding winning barrio headline news:

 

Barrio volunteers  firefighters  arrested con marijuana after turning fire out.

 

el compadre soliz storeage busted con weed.

 

and finally el chuco garza arrested after he flagged constable down for ride.

 

 At noon yesterday el chuco Garza a well know bum in the hood, was arrested by el constable cadena. It seems que garza was standing in the middle of the road and waving and  flagged  down cars, but did manage to stop el constable and asked for a ride to the house on the hill. El constable cadenas report indicated que he appeared unsteady on his feet and a bit nervous. El constable ask m.  garza if he was on medication. But Mr. garza answer no I just smoked pot. The constable pulled over his car and  searched mr Garza. Which he found a few ounces of marijuana in his coat pockets and a roll of twenty dollar bills totally up to $400. dollars.  Mr gara was arrested and if convicted, he could face lots of time in jail.

 

Late last night el constable cadena con su special barrio task force 666, from el ojo junior barrio private eye academy arrested el owner, el compadre soliz for having found more than 752 marijuana plants inside one of his rental storage units. It seemed que a member of let me put the finger on you committee wanted to rent that special unit,  but was not for rent. So the committee member left pissed off and decided to call el constable to see what was up. El constable tells us que el compadre soliz said he was force to grow the plants to help his wife la commadre soliz lopez silva medical treatment. For some reason or another she has a hard time sleeping during the day says mr soliz, so she needed a few hits off a joint to sleep better. He was taken to the jail house across the tracks.

 

Yesterday afternoon los vatos locos volunteers firefighters were the first to arrive at a burning home on third and wells street . Once the real fire fighters from across the tracks got there they suspected that something was up because los vatos locos volunteer fire fighters were acting kinda nervous and were seen ferrying buckets of water to the fire themselves. Los locos were hoping que los neighbors wouldn’t call the real firefighters. Once el constable cadena got there and the fire was turned off he found several marijuana plants growing in the basement of the home and a few plants inside los vatos 1978 red ford whatever trunk.   No one from the home was arrested but three vatos locos were and taken in for questioning.

 

ok raza there you have it for today’s hejola report I am bill diaz.

el taqucaha barrio fantasy baseball championship 2012

 

20012Cchwnn presents : THE ROAD TO EL TAQUCAHA BARRIO FANTASY BASEBALL CHAMPIONSHIP 2012

10182012.

 

Como estan todo mi raza, I am Frankie tuxedo zuniga sports correspondent for cchwnn. Well it’s that time again where we are looking for make believe teams for this years one weekend tournament. In order to make this happen we are looking for team to play this year. Please email us your team name by this Friday at cchwnn@netscape.net.

 

 

The following are teams that have already signed up:

 

YANCY’S ALL PUERTO RICO TEAM,

LITTLE RAY RAY’S LITTLE TEAM,

HAM Y SU HAMBURGER SLUGGGERS ,

CRAZY LILY’CHUY LOCOS DE DALLAS.

LOS JUARVILLE STATE VATO’S TEAM DE MI.

TEXAS MIKE Y SU FRIENDS TEAM

SPOOKYS LAS VEGAS ALL STARS.

LORENZO`S LLAMAS.

LOS POCHOS DE CALI

CCHWNN.

FRANK Y STEVE ALL STAR CHICANO TEAM

AL new Buena gente all stars.

SOY CHICANO Y PROUD TEAM.

MARTIN CHAPA CHAPA’BOYS.

JAR3 BIG OLD TIMERS ,

TEJANO VATOS ON A JOURNAL,

EL DEFENZOR Y SU COTTON PICKER TEAM,

MIKKA Y SU LEFT HANDEDTEAM,

TEJANO ROOTS ALL STARS TEAM.

LOS RUIZ FAMILY DE TOPEKA TEAM ,

LOS SIFUNETES DE SOUTH TEJAS.           

COMMANDER CAPT CODY CARRALES Y SU COMMADERS,

LOS CRAZY LOPEZ BOYZY DE KINGSVILLE ,.

GRIN Y SIMILE ALL TOM BOY TEAM

DHOCC SOUTHERN RAZA TEAMS ,

SAM Y ROSA BOYS DE SAN ANTO,

 

So if you website team has not join, do it now for this years

 

EL TAQUCHA BARRIO BASEBALL CHAMPIONS FOR 2012, TO BE HELDED IN CONJUNTION WITH THE GRAND OPENING OF THE WESTINGHOUSE BARRIO MALL THIS OCTOBER 31,2012.

HAVE A GREAT TEJANO DAY.

westinghouse barrio mall newsletter for 10172012

Westinghouse barrio mall newsletter for 10172012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, TX. Hello again I am Gloria Guerra con this week’s Westinghouse barrio mall newsletter. Si many folk stormed the mall this past weekend to check out our all the mall specials, it was a sellout crowd and not too much trouble neither.  Anyhow this weekend we will be having Halloween sales and some live music and shit load of things going on. So let’s get to that coverage and visit our third floor barrio zoo con Ramón Ruiz the manager and owner.

Si Gloria thanks and I am Ramón Ruiz here at the third floor of our mall barrio zoo. We are real excited on our grand opening again of the zoo, as you might remember que some of the little critters got loose so we had to around the hood an collect as many as we could to justified the zoo exhibits. Anyhow our main attraction this weekend is the cockroach section. We have two very special roaches a white color one and one that has two heads. So get the whole family over here a check it out, and now back to Gloria.

 

Ok Ramón, now let’s go to alcardio samuido at our main stage. Si Gloria this weekend we are preparing ourselves for the seventh  annual clown fest. It’s always been a pleasure to have this event here even though we have had some trouble con estos clown before. But this year we have hired at least ten more security force 666 staff to help us keep control, and now back to Gloria.

 

Ok my friend now let’s makes sure folks that if you do drive drink. Let’s go to Frankie tuxedo zuniga at our cona Lozano cash and carry sports complex.

Si raza como estan I am Frankie tuxedo an getting ready for those baseball playoff and cowboy football. If you go shopping here at the mall our sports complex has three giant tvs and we are real proud to have all the baseball and football you want to watch while you shop. We have free beer for everyone regardless of age (must be over 45). So come on down and join in the fun. And if you drink please drive. Now back to Gloria.

Ok Frankie thanks, well folks lets not forget to put your stuff on lay a way cause xmas is just around the corner.

I am Gloria Guerra an have a great tejano day.

exclusive interview con frank salazar de tejano music awards 2012

Exclusive interview con frank Salazar de Tejano music awards 2012, the day after.

Cchwnn.

San Antonio, tx. Hello again raza we are here in San Antonio to do a follow up con Frank Salazar, I am Blanca blanch Blanco. Now for that interview.

Bbb: hello Frank how are you doing, again can you give me a hand off this bicycle?

FS: Seguro que si.

BBB: ok sir tell us in your observation how did this year music award turn out?

FS: Overall good.  There were some glitches but we’ve already made some adjustments and we should be ready for a great awards in 2013.  It will be way better.  You know, lessons learned.

 

 

 

BBB: in the future is there really a need to rent out such a big hall for such an event?

FS:  Actually, it’s not a hall.  It’s more like an arena used for concerts, sporting events, conventions, etc.  It’s an amazing complex.  We do need this size of venue because we have big plans for the future of Tejano.  It creates a better atmosphere for our awards program and I do believe that it makes for a better experience for all our attendees.  We are returning to the Alamodome next year and will have a bigger audience than this last year.  We’ll announce our plans soon.

BBB: I am sure you have read and heard many comments concerning this year’s program, what did we do different this year that previous years?

 

 

 

 

FS:  Of course I’ve heard.  No man is an island you know.  We’ve heard the good, the bad, and the ugly.  Some comments are warranted and some not so much.  We take all comments with a grain of salt.  We always try to make improvements but back to your question.  Some differences for this past year were:

 1) Going back to the Alamodome

 2) Hiring a new company to do the staging

3) Hiring a  new company for the sound and lights.

4) Involving new and out-of-state talent as part of our performances.

 

BBB: in trying to provide live performances, is there a time limit that those performers have to inform you they won’t make the show?

 

 

FS:  We try to commit these acts ahead of time but there may be circumstances that are beyond our control.  In those cases we just need to keep moving forward.  Fortunately, most artists keep their word and show up.

BBB; just to let you know sir we did vote this year, now what kind of an agreement or understanding does a winner have if they don’t plan on being at the awards?

FS:  We take every situation on a case by case basis.  We may play a pre-recorded message to show the audience if possible.  If not, we arrange for one of the artists representatives to accept.  We do stress the importance of everyone to make an effort to be there whether they’re nominated or not.  We do this for our industry and if the artists do not support each other why should anyone else.

BBB: and finally sir is there any thing you will like to add to our interview that we might have not covered?

FS:  There’s a lot I could add but I won’t bore you with the details.  Just remember, there are three types of people in this world: 1) Those that make things happen 2) Those who watch things happen and 3) Those who wonder what the hell happened.  I’m sure we’ll here from all of these fine folks once you post this interview.  Everyone is entitled to their opinions right, wrong, or indifferent.  We take the good with the bad and keep on trucking.  In the mean time, everybody, ready, aim, fire.

BBB: again frank you have a very difficult job in trying to make the whole world happy and we are very proud to say que you are doing a great job and don’t stop. But for now can you give me a hand back on this bicycle?

FS:  Sure.  Now go out there and make things happen and don’t try to please everyone as long as you know your doing your best with what you have.

 

BBB: sometime us tejanos might not be happy with what many are trying to do? In this case Frank Salazar is one of many that has his share in making la onda what it is and giving many the opportunity to voice our concerns. Yes pancho you are the greatest, for now.

hejola report for 10162012

Hejola report for 10162012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello again I am David Duran con today’s award winning barrio headline news

Barrio up in arms over targeted 47 percent.

El compadre arrested for under the influence.

And finally a barrio storage wars comes to town.

Yesterday several members of the hood were very excited que some folks from the tv series storage wars, might pass by the hood in order to get to corpus. Many of the hood members plan on setting up garage sale sales all along the highway, hoping que them might just stop in town to look at some of the junk they have for sale. Please remember que some one’s junk might just be someone’s treasure.

El compadre Andrew Jackson Gomez was arrested and cited for dui, pi, gi, GED, and many more citations, when el constable noticed him being parked right in front of the constable command post. It seemed like he was doing alright until walked up to him say el constable. When I asked him what his name was and what he was doing, Gomez responded by say gaga, and popo.. he was taken to the lalaland hospital for observations.  

Yesterday a rally was held for those claiming to be the 47 percent. But some barrio members thought it was a rally for those persons over the age of 47 year old. Two persons were arrested and several pet animals: three cats, two dogs and one pig are being held for questioning.

Ok raza have a great day.

hejola report for 10152012

 

Hejola report for 10152012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello again I am bill diaz con our award winning barrio headline news:

City turns off residents’ water living on the corner of third and wells.

Ten ugly campaign posters damaged.

Barrio politics gets ugly.

You know when hard times hits the hood, when the city is forced to shut off a whole block of water to its residents due to the fact que they had paid their water bill. El constable was called to see what the problem was and once he got word que the whole block had failed to pay its bill he didn’t think it was worth his time to investigate. Until he realized que he was one of those residents. We asked him about this matter and he responded by saying que the check was in the mail.

El constable cadena was called out yesterday afternoon when a candidate told him que some one had poured hot chili pepper sauces on some of his campaign posters, and printed ugly words on them. The constable couldn’t quite tell us what those ugly words were because they didn’t know how to spell the words the candidate thought they said.

Yesterday was the first debate between esta vato loco y one of the few white folks living in the hood Russell Rufus redneck, who both are running for barrio city representative. The debate got a bit ugly when Russell accused esta vato loco for being stone at the debate, but esta vato loco held his ground when he told the crowd que “ Russell Rufus redneck was ugly and his mama says his ugly, he don’t need on a liable he was just ugly”. Well that didn’t go well with Russell so he rebuttal by says “you can kiss my grit”. At the end of the debate both men went their separate ways.

Ok raza have a great day.

Hejola report for 10102012.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville, TX. Hello again General fideo vermicelli con today’s award winning barrio headline news;
El barrio hit with a new British Colonialism.
Trickle-down economics might not be the answer, says es vato loco.
And now so good news.
We finally found out why our water bill was so freaking high. It seems que the folks living in front of our home who we share the bill with didn’t notice que their water heater had rusted the bottom out and running water ran freely for about several months. The bill this month was almost $900 dollars. The good news is que they, the city has not shut it down yet, but are willing to work with us on that bill, but wont until we show proof que we fixed the water heater, ching.. a
Yesterday at a local tavern some persons were discussing the issue of wages and labor force in the hood. At the end of the discussion this reporter felt que a new era for the working class. The idea of a New British Colonialism has been able to make its way into the hood by seeking to produce a low wage labor force here in the barrio, by defeating some barrio unions, and for sure not providing enough healthcare­, depleting worker rights at some taco stands, rolling back regulation­, minimizing or doing away with corporate tax obligation­...in other words defeating the middle class, which we find ourselves not even part off.
And finally, last night at a political rally, es vato loco who is running for barrio representive tried to explain to a handful of locos que we should not fall into this thing called"Trickle-down economics". He pointed out que "the trickle-down theory" is a terms used now a days, to describe the idea that tax breaks or other economic benefits provided by government to businesses and the wealthy will benefit poorer members of society by improving the economy as a whole. He also mention que a famous person Will Rogers once said trickle down economics meant "money was all appropriated for the top in hopes that it would trickle down to the needy, was the whole idea behind that statement. In addition, esta vato loco pointed out que the only thing we have to look up too is cheaper beer and hope to make it to the next pay check.
Ok raza have a great day

hejola report for 10092012

 

Hejola report for 10092012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, texas. Hello again I am bill diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Bath salt hits the hood.

Fake Barrio police officer demands free tacos.

And finally praying didn’t help.

Last night after leaving a gay Tejano bar two vato’s  named Joe Perez y Jose Perez were arrested for DWI. As they sat in the back seat of el constable car while he the constable searched their own car, both vato’s it was reported que were touching hands  and quietly begging the divine intervention that the guns in their car wouldn’t be found. Once the constable spotted the guns, he decided to strip search the two and revealed a baggie of suspected bath salt in one of Perez pockets. Both were arrested.

In other news ,Yesterday a record breaking arrested occurred right inside the Barrio church. It seems que el constable cadena was real busy arresting several barrio members that purchased the bath salt to get high. El constable told us que at least three church goers were high on that bath salt and interrupted church services.  In one occasion one of the barrio members on that bath salt was holding a knife in the air and wanted to talk to god. All three were arrested and taken to lalala land hospital for observation.

 And finally, El shorty Jimenez aka Deputy Dog was arrested by el constable and some real cops from the other side of the tracks when he was reported by some employees of a barrio taco stand told us que Deputy dog wanted some free tacos and a drink and a cup of coffee, and some donuts to go.  The workers call the constable cadena and when he showed up El Shorty was still parked inside the parking lot.  He was arrested and authorities found two fake police badges and a extra plastic handgun. He will be charged with impersonating a police officer and improper exhibition of a firearm and a bill for all the stuff he ate.

Ok raza you better watch out and you better not cry because sancho clause is coming to town.

hejola report for 10082012

Hejola report for 10082012.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello again mi raza, question of the day can we save big bird? And now for our award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio man claims sex victory.

Yesterday el senor Mario Munoz was awarded the more sexist man in the hood.

Vato declared que he was the smartest man in the room, until some else walked in.

And again city leaders and county leaders denied softly DWI law.

It seems that a certain church in our city was denied again, a request to open a church on this side of the tracks because they felt que their priest might get caught driving within intoxicated. All we way says a church leader is for the city and county law dogs to give us a small break. The fear was que the church felt que their presit might have too much of a work load one day and might not making back to the other side of the tracks. The official told them to bring a tent and camp over if they felt too drunk to drive.

 

Ben torres was arrested for talking to himself during lunch at the local church hall way. He declared out loud, someone said que he was the smartest man in the room, until we all walked in on him. After a few minutes of trying to rethink his statement he was arrested for trespassing by el constable cadena.

It took some courage but he was able to win this year’s less sexist man in the hood for the seven year in a row. Mario Munoz, now around 85 had told many folks in the hood que he was the only man in hood not having sex. After some research we found why? que esta ven feyo.

Ok raza bye for now.