sancho clause a barrio xmas story 2013

Sancho clause a barrio xmas story 2013.

Ccwhnn.

Kingsville,tx. It was the night before xmas, y sancho clause was drunk like usually. As he tried to round up los little deer, well, tried to start  his john deer riding mow. It was his annual thing, where all the children, well all the adult women he dates in the hood waited for this cold night, well it really was a humid one, but as he managed to climb on his riding mow he moved as fast as he could go, well let’s say he moved as fast as the mower could go.

As he rode down that county road as fast as he could go, el constable cadena was on the lookout for him. There were several reasons why, it seems que at this time ever year, esta pincha sancho clause had the bad habit of drinking and driving.

 

 And then making sure que he went an visited todas las movides que he has or let’s had him and some he done before. Many times before many of los husbands de estas women or las movides would complaint que he was making too much noise and que the songs he was singing weren’t even xmas songs,.

Well this xmas was going to be a little different, you see el sancho clause this year set up a booth at the corner of third and wells and was charging to taking sancho clause pictures with him. Business was real good until xmas eve. It seems que sancho forgot to put on his sancho clause outfit pants on, and instead was not wearing anything but his chonas better known in the hood as his speedos . Several good families and their children stopped to take a holiday picture con esta clause. Pero realized que esta vato was drunk and wearing only his underwear or his famous speedos.

 Several families did call el constable cadena, to come and check esta way out. Sancho clause was arrested and will not be home for xmas again this year.

The moral of this story is que when you are having a good time con either your wife or girlfriend or even la commadre and in some cases el compadre, stay home, and if you drink don’t drive and if you drive don’t drink. Have a safe Christmas. This announcement was paid for by the committee on let me put the finger on you committee.

hejola report for 12162013

Hejolia report for 12162013

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, tx. Hello again I am bill diaz con today’s award winning headline news. Gee counting down towards xmas. Gee all I want is a go go girl. But for now let’s get to our award winning headline news:

Oldest member in the hood gets visit from former first grade teacher.

Constable cadena bust barrio only prostitution ring, dang it.

And reward for stolen “my kid”.

Our creator Daniel, had a cat named my kid, well this weekend my kid was stolen from my home and we are offering a large sum of hugs and lots of you know what for his return. Ever single crack head in the hood has signed up looking for my kid. We just can’t wait to see who took my kid says Daniel the creator. He is very heart broken says a person who didn’t want to give us their name (Bill) “it was a friendly cat that made Daniel’s day, almost every day”. If anyone has seen my kid please contact us here.

In other news, Yesterday afternoon el constable cadena y su barrio task force 666 shut down a prostitution ring which had been in business about two years. Several male and female customers were arrested at the home of la commadre Gloria Sevilla, owner of the home. She told this reporter que she didn’t know que the girls she had rented rooms too, had a small business going on. “gee if I would have known it would have been a different story” says ms. Sevilla. Ms. Sevilla believe the girls when asked about all the visitors they had, they told her que they were students doing either homework or research. And a second home was also busted at or near the corner of third and wells. The owner of the home was not there but el constable and some of his cops waited awhile till the owners showed up. Oh by the way no one was taken in,huh….constable cadena tell us que both of these organizers were facing charges with promoting prostitution. A fourth degree felony.

And finally ,It seems que Don Pedro Ramirez just turned 85 years old was real surprise to see his first grade teacher at the party. Maria Gonzales now 103 years old was very excited to see que Don Pedro grew up a very handsome young man and did something with his life. It’s been more than 70^th years since I had last seen him, and he sure has changed a bit. But I am so glad que he made it out of first grade, says Mrs. Gonzales.

Well there you have it for today, counting towards xmas, con sancho clause.

barrio stock market report for 12132013

Barrio stock market report for 12132013.

Cchwnn,

Kingsville,tx. Hello again and ask we approach the end of this year we seemed to be preparing ourselves for this coming general major election. But before you go and vote make sure you invest on our barrio stock market. Now for that award winning barrio stock market report:                                                       

                                                                

Los tamales > up $5.50 a dozen.

Los taquitos^ stable $1.29 cent each coffee is extra.

Las tortillas > going for the sky up $1.50 a pack. Dang.

Las empanadas> up $.85 cent each.

La barbacoa de cabeza > up $6.50 a lb. llama meat no impact yet.

Cheap beer and wine< down $4.60 a six pack.           

 

 Barrio want ads:

 

Item #. 75846:  used bicycle for sale. Has no tires but a used rim. Make offer.

Item#56841: used women underwear for sale. All size, make offer for lot. Please note super g-stings. I bet size 43, easy.

 

Item #56243; let over easter rabbits and chickens for sale. Some in good health and other you decide. Make offer soon.

Item # 54216: use tires sale, have all size but need a few to get the ones we don’t have . have look around the hood. Do have or some special rim that we found at the corner of wells and third street.

Item #. 75846:  used bicycle for sale. Has no tires but a used rim. Make offer.

Item#56841: used women underwear for sale. All size, make offer for lot. Please note super g-stings. I bet size 43, easy.

Item #56243; let over easter rabbits and chickens for sale. Some in good health and other you decide. Make offer soon.

Item # 54216: use tires sale, have all size but need a few to get the ones we don’t have . have look around the hood. Do have or some special rim that we found at the corner of wells and third street.

Item #56584: used green bay packer shirts and caps for sale. 

Ok raza there you have it for today. You better watch out and you better not cry because sancho clause is coming tonight.

 

Well folks there you have it, have a great tejano day and see you later gator. Go cowboys.

hejola report for 12122013

Hejola report for 12122013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am David Duran with today’s award winning barrio headline news:

trickle-down economics part of everyday in the hood.

Barrio man arrested for fighting con sancho clause at the mall parking lot.

And finally some darn good news.

Yesterday barrio member were informed that the barrio lotto will be running for this christmas holiday. The lotto had been suspended for awhile due to the fact that there were no funds to lotto off. So this week you will be able to purchase your lotto ticket just in time for Christmas. This years lotto winnings might just reach $10.50, good luck raza.

What is the big deal with this trickle-down economics now a days? Did you know that this has always been a part of living in the hood and we can give you several examples. Why is it that in large families all the younger members of that family wear hand me down clothing, trickle-down economics. Why is it that we never throw stuff away, because we might need to have it later, trickle-down economics. Garage sales, front yard sales, back yard sales, moving sales, yard sales, and whatever you want to call them, are considered trickle-down economics. All and all we know what trickle- down economics really means.            

Yesterday el compadre martin chapa Gomez was arrested along con Pedro Morales aka sancho clause after both men got into an intense boxing match at the mall parking lot. Lots of punches were thrown and most of them not landing. But the excitement was enough for someone to call el constable that came over and arrested both strugglers. Charges are pending, after the constable will determine what caused all this action Jackson.

Ok there you have and have a safe day and holidays.

hejola report for 12102013

Hejola report for 12102013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx.hello I am david duran con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio pollution increase con cold weather.

Two men and ten cats busted at the corner of third and wells.

And finally some dang good news.

Well the vato loco’s volunteer firefighters have agreed with the city and the county que they won’t be drinking, smoking, cussing, stealing, robbing, lying, back stabling, punching, hitting, kicking, biting, and talking chit to any body during these holidays, and also promise to keep their eyes open and ears clean just in case there is a fire and they have to call someone. Good luck loco’s.

It seems that this time of the year folks want to get rid of their unwanted pets and that seems to be in the increase these past few weeks. A few barrio members and members of the barrio welcome wagon have notice that now that this people are watching and caring for all those poor cats that Tina v. left behind. But yesterday was no different than other days due to the fact that county animal control is also camping out at that same corner trying to bust this illegal thing. And that’s what happen yesterday when two men from who know where tried to dump ten cats and drove off but were busted down the street.  The animal control caught at least ten of the hundreds of cats they brought with them. Charges will be filed against these persons.

 

Yesterday our own barrio weather man San Juan Norterno told this report que the pollution level here in the hood has gone sky high since the cold weather came in. the among of pollution is up at least 35 percent at this time compared to last month. One of the main reasons says San Juan is due to the large number of people using fire places to keep warm and burning wood outside to stay warm. Barrio Environmentalist, Juan Delgad, tell us que Burning firewood can either be damaging to the environment or it can be helpful. It all comes down to your choices as a consumer and the way you burn your wood and the source you choose to get it from. Ok raza there you have it you decided.

 

Ok raza and now for those compadres y commadres que ran off their overweight love ones, I told you so, que one day you would miss them. Chinga.

hejola report for 12092013

Hejola report for 12092013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello again, I am Maria Malone Baloney, hello raza. Now for our award winning barrio headline news:

Mariachi band members shot and some will survive.

La posada parade riot over weekend.

And finally some good news.

The barrio welcome wagon has announced that it will keep on accepting pets that people don’t want any more at the corner of third and wells. The welcome wagon folks tell us que the home owned by Tina V which is by the way surrounded by at least 150 persons, 24 hours a day have agreed to care for this poor unwanted pets.

Late Saturday evening a mariachi band named Sun Shine Mariachi’s were hired to do a late night serenade to a family living in a big barrio trailer parker. You and I know that there are some dark spots in the hood if you live in a trailer park and that is the case here. El Mariachi Sun Shine band members were walking around a trailer house that had one of the darkness spots in the park looking for the address that hired them, but many across the street believe to be men walking around with assault weapons decided to take the first shots at this so call terrorist, killing two of the six band members and wounding at least three more. Once the lights of several mobile homes came on, many noticed that they had fired on this mariachi band. Several park members called 918 and a chit load of police surrounded the trailer park. More details late this week.

This past weekend was the annual La Posada parade held along the most beautiful street on our side of town turned out to be the bloodiest in history. It seems that one of the float drivers ( two tons of fun float)  fell asleep and got off the parade route and ran over at least 30 men, women, children, cats, and dogs standing along the side walk. Once the float came to a halt, family members still standing rush the float and pulled now the awaken float driver out of the float and started to beat him up. One of the parents went as far as lighting the float on fire that caused the float sponsors and their staff to run over and help the driver as he was been beaten up, and tried to turn the fire off. Once the barrio volunteer vato locos  fire fighters arrived the fire had already spread to some corner store that started a fired next to the bakery that explored and started a fire across the street. Once the smoke and the fires were turned off, at least 10 stores were either damaged or burned down, not counting the float. Charges are pending on chingos de persons and chingos de charges will be filed.

Ok raza have a great weekend and don’t go downtown in the hood, too much investigations going on. Dang don’t you just love all the excitement going on.

barrio stock market report for 12062013

Barrio stock market report for 12062013.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,tx. Como estan I am urbano yosabatodo con this week’s barrio stock market report for this Friday. Sometime in the next few days I will have my end of the year economic report for all you big time small time spenders. But for now let’s get right to that award winning report:
Las tamales, well don’t say I didn’t tell you. As indicated in o...ther barrio site the increase of making homemade tamales has increase by at least 18 percent ( based the number of people in our block vs. the number that make their own tamales)now that increase do expect the tamales to go up everywhere you go. Las tamales ended the week at a all time high of $6.50 a dozen in some case up to $7.00.
Las tortillas, well this market has its ups and downs but this week it ended pretty stable, tortillas both flour and corn. Flour small pack of 12 @1.52 and corn small pack of 12@1.35 .
Cheap beer, this market has just taken an increase, six pack ended the week @4.95 a six pack.
Las empanadas, that special holiday treat, which is an all around treat now a day’s end pretty stable at $.89 each. Or a none so fresh pack at those quick stops on the freeway for about$2.00 a pack of 4.
La barbacoa de cabeza going for about $6.50 lb. and big increase, llama not available this week.
Los taquitios ended the week at $1.59 each and coffee is extra.

Barrio want ads:

#4875639: several used bicycles, buy the whole lot or only the ones you need.
#889799: Easter chickens and ducks still available, still have some color on them, make offer for all ten chickens and 15 ducks. All still walking and look in good health.
#983455: several women clothing all sizes’ make bit for all the lot.

Barrio realtors:
Ok we got a house that is for sale but needs to be moved off the lot, from the corner of wells and third street moved to the corner of wells and fourth street.
Ok raza got to go. Have a great Tejano day.See More

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hejola report for 12052013

Hejola report for 12052013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,texas.  Hello again I am bill diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news;

Maria Malone news reporter on the hot seat.

Two brothers former altar boys arrested.

Hello  I am Maria Malone on assignment covering the altercation between two brothers, former alter boy’s, were arrested after one of them try to strangle the other brother at the books store with a tassel from there scholarship they got. The report says que the brothers got into it when they discovered que the scholarship only covered one of the them. Both were arrested and taken to jail. Please note that the brothers are Siamese twins.

 

Yesterday the creator had some choices words for our newly staff person, Maria Malone on her report about the altar boys being arrested and not pointing out at the being of her story that them boy’s were Siamese twins. No word if maria Malone will still be on the non payroll. Oh well.

And finally a cold front has come into our area and we are asking folks in the hood to make sure all them hoes are indoors and not outside looking for money or trying to make money. In addition make sure you bring in your pets, flowers, and almost anything that be harmed by the cold front.

Ok have a warm night and keep warm.

hejola report for 12042013

Westinghouse barrio mall newsletter for 12042013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, TX. Hello I am Gloria Guerra, now with our mall newsletter headlines:

Idea of another Tejano gay bar to open at the mall, mall official’s rebuff.

Yesterday Veronica La Lesbian report to us that the mall officials had met with Pinky Pan Gomez a he/she person owner of several bars in the area explain his/her idea of planning a far out Tejano disco bar right here at the mall. The mall officials could not confirm that the meeting was even held but indication inside a certain area of the mall was under construction. Well Gloria?

Ahh ok thanks Ronnie, now for our other headline news:

Barrio clown fest might just happen.

The three barrio clown organization announced that this year’s Christmas clown fest will be held right here at the mall but outside on the parking lot, in order to avoid any more trouble with these groups each group will be placed on different parts of the parking lot to avoid any violence like the times before. Every year for some reason these groups have had several rounds of uncalled for actions. The fest is schedule for Christmas Eve.

And finally, the mall sancho clause contest is coming to an end this weekend. Where the best looking sancho clause will be granted a two week contract to sit in the center stage welcoming children wanting to love sancho and tell him what they want for Christmas. Wow only in America.

 

Ok folks thanks I am Gloria Guerra good day.

hejola report for 12032013

Hejola report for 12032013.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,Texas. Hello again mi raza how are we doing?  I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:
Increase on Christmas sales on the raise.
Barrio leaders plan on moving Christmas to February.
And finally some good news.
The barrio welcome wagon is still holding the corner of third and wells hostage from the state, county and local animal control folks still trying to invade Tina V Gonzales home, who by the way was declared died by last seen alive in another county. Tina has in her back yard over 200 people on a daily bases watching over her 15 cats or more. But we want to let you know that the number of cats has increased to 252. It seems that the community has decided to keep on bring straw cats to her home for a safe haven. Dang. Pray for us on this one.
After a few hours of discuss this matter barrio leaders plan on presenting an idea to move or at least move some of the Christmas activities to February, there were some valid reasons to move it says one of the barrio leaders. Look if we move some of the Christmas activities to February there is a sure chance of increase Christmas sales there too. Another reason was that a large portion of the hood gets their IRS tax returns around that time and we should take advantage of that and the extra money people have to invest back into the hood. Hmm great idea, what do you think? Humbug!
Yesterday el barrio welcome wagon told us que this year’s sales are a bit higher than last years at the same period. It seems que barrio members have gotten a bit smarter than years before, they put stuff on lay a way when they are cheaper and get them out just in time for Christmas, good job raza.
Ok raza have a great day.

thanksgviving 11272013

Thanksgiving special report for 11272013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello my friends I am Bill Diaz the main vato here at cchwnn, now that our creator (Daniel) goes into his 62 thanksgiving we want to give thanks to all our friends that have supported our news and a few thanks to those who don’t. It really does matter in some cases that we provide you with the most important news about the hood. With that in mind, let’s wish the rich or poor, dumb or smart, tall or short, heavy or light weight, single or married, gay or straight, happy or sad, clueless or smart ass, democratic or racist, legal or illegal, walking or running the best of thanksgiving, and remember when there is food there should be food for everyone, god bless you.. Now enough of that tear jerking comments and now for our award winning barrio headline news:

Alcohol and whiskey and wild wild women.

Turkey Barrio Company ships its last load of turkeys.

And finally some good turkey news.

Well this year the barrio community center will have its annual turkey dinner at the center but with a few new ideas, well not really new but at lease it sounds news. Ever persons that comes to eat have to bring the following: folks, spoons, plate, bread, drink, napkins and some darn good matters.

Well after a ruff five years of shipping turkeys nationwide and only a few loads making their distention have decided it was cheaper to close down the company instead of paying high price security escort to guarantee delivering of its fine turkeys. Mr. Moore, the owner said enough is enough, we gone and going to move somewhere else where we don’t have to fight these “keep turkeys alive groups”. My god this folks are worries that the tea party.

 

El partner Juan Anderson Martinez was arrested last night after he was asked to leave the only gay Tejano bar Two tons of fun, when started a fight with a man dress like a woman. The constables report says that El partner was screaming and yelling “Alcohol and whiskey and wild wild women’ and started grabbing everybody until he grabbed Sonny a man 6’ 5” and weights 300 lbs who really didn’t appreciate being touched never the less grabbed, turned around and grabbed El Partner from the neck and threw his little body frame out the freaking door. El Partner who is about 5”2” tall and weighing in at around 130 lbs wet, was stunned and kind of still talking about Alcohol and whiskey and wild wild women, when the constable got to the bar. EL was arrested and will spend the holidays being bars with others who wished about Alcohol and whiskey and wild wild women.

Well raza thanks again and have a happy thanksgiving and watch that waist line, I am Bill Diaz, good day.

westinhouse barrio mall newsletter for 11212013

Westinghouse barrio mall newsletters con Gloria Guerra.

11212013.

 

(Mysterious voice) now here is Gloria Guerra:

 

Thank you again, mi raza Como estan todos? Well its 24 hours from now and we are already geared up for this festival here at the Westinghouse barrio mall. We lots of things to cover today, so let’s get right to it.

 

First of all let’s go to our new and improved CONJUNTO DANCE LAND con our own conjunto correspondent, that guy que like to dance taqucha style MMMmaria Malone.

 

Hello again raza, I am MMM Malone, standing in front of our new and improved conjunto dance land. Starting tomorrow will be the start of our long weekend puro bailes and party. Here is the great line up for this week and weekend.:

 

THURSDAY NIGHT:

 

3:00pm to 5:00pm> EL CONJUNTO DE MARTHA GARZA.

 

6:00pm to 8:00pm>. el LEFT PATCH ZORRIO Y LOS ZOMBIES  DE LA JOYA, TX.

 

9:00pm to 11:00pm> GLORIA big mama BIGGER Y SU BIG MAMA biggers.

 

FRIDAY NIGHT :

 

6:pm to 8:0pm> la movida de Federico hinojosa de Laredo, tex.

 

9:00pm to 11:00pm> Bucky Lopez from grupo 'Los tejano bucks'.

 

SATURDAY ALL DAY:

 

12:00pm to 2pm> Los crazy dudes from NY, NY.

 

3:00pm to 5:pm> Harrycore Ramirez del group hardcore Mary u su conjunto de                  

       corpitos./

 

7:00pm to 9:00pm > Janie y Las Masotas.

 

10:00pm to 12:00am> Siloma Griffin ruelas del group siloma del valle.

 

And finally Sunday afternoon :

 

2:00pm to 4:00pm> DON PEDRO “el pelon cara de nopal”.

 

6:00pm to 8:00pm> Cristina y los Cream Puffs.

 

 Si raza as you can see we have a heck of a line up, so have a nice day and make sure that if you are drinking do drive, the county, the city and the state needs the money and now back to gloria.

 

Ok thanks Malone balone,. Ok raza, now let’s go to our CONA LOZANO CASH AND CARRY SPORTS COMPLEX, with an update, with our own sports guy FRANKIE TUXEDO ZUNIGA.

 

Si gloria I am frankie standing here in front of our sports complex. We are getting ready to accept teams for these year’s “2013 EL TAQUCHA FANTASY FOOTBALL CHAMPIONSHIP TO BE HELD IN TWO WEEKS.  So make sure an email your team names: cchwnn@netscape.net. Now back to Gloria.

 

Ok thanks Frankie, now let’s go to our main stage here at the mall and lets go to Mr turkey our mall mascot.

 

Mr. Turkey: gobble goblle goblele al eoathl e.

 

Ok thank mr turkey, oh he said that this weekend we have lots and lots of cheap  things for sale here at the mall and make sure and lay a way for that Christmas day.

 

Ok raza I am Gloria Guerra have a great holiday.

hejola report for 11202013

Hejola report for 11202013.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville, Texas, hello I am Mmmaria Malone with the number one barrio news network, which I am very proud to be member of this team. Now for our award winning barrio news:
Constable ends riot at t-ball game.
Pansasos and pandemonium at the tee ball game.
And some real good news.
Now that the tamale season is just around the corner, lots of animal advocates ar...e a bit worried along with the barrio animal control que lots of pets have been showing up missing on that Barrio Woof Woof missing pets on our barrio face book. The constable has instructed his staff and los vato’s loco volunteer firefighters to keep an eye open for anything or anyone that don’t look normal.
Today el constable gave out the names and address of those folks who started a riot and were arrested at a tee ball game. The constable pointed out that this type of action and parents acting like little kids just don’t cut it. We have arrest warrants out for some of these parents, and believe me I am going to bust them.
And finally, Base on the report it all started when an unknown man verbally insulted and accused a kid of wearing stolen tee ball gear. Juana Chavez mother of child along with her muffin top confronted the suspect and the lonja grabbing began, pushing and punches were exchanged among the parents until constable cadena had to arrest several of the parents, three tee baller’s and several cats and dogs were all haul to jail. Charges are pending. Oh by the way, Juana and her lonjas are okay. Suspect still at large says el constable.Ok folks thanks again and hope to hear from me real soon, I am Mmmaria Malone, good day.

hejola report for 11192013

Hejola report for 11192013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, texas. Hello again raza, I am Veronica la lesbian con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Gay Tejano bar sets standards.

Tejanos file suit against gay Tejano bar.

And finally some real good news.

Yesterday it was announced the Tejano days will be held this year at the Westinghouse bar mall. The lineup includes the history of tejano’s in the hood, schedule of events to be announce soon, attractions highlights will be provide also. So save your money and come on down to this year’s Tejano days coming soon.

Two want to be tejanos, who by the way work at an office and never in their life’s have been a Tejano filed a law suit against two tons of fun over the ability to identify who is male or female at that bar. You know you get tired of asking a woman to dance and turn out to be another man. How in the world can you slow dance with that, says one of the want to be Tejano who filed the law suit. The law suit will be discussed at the next court date set for August 12, 2033.

 

And finallyYesterday the only Tejano gay bar in the nation “two tons of fun” announced that they will be enforcing new bathroom and makeup standards for its remodel bar. Le Plu, the new manager told us que they were going to make the bar more attractive to tejanos and not so much for you know who? So we are going to require that all gay men and women must register at the door and be given an arm bracelet to make sure we know if they are men or women. Furthermore they will require so much makeup on a person to make sure we know what sex they really are.

Ok raza see you all sooner than later.

hejola report for 111182013

Hejola report for 11182013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello again, I am David Duran, have you ever noticed how time flies when you have money vs. when you don’t have money it moves really really slow? But for now here is our award winning barrio headline news:

Tina V. memorial center.

Cat lovers increased.

And now so good darn news.

Local barrio Christmas groups are requesting the barrio to limit the number of sancho clause vs. the real santa clauses. Last year a member of this group told us que there can only be some many santa clauses and of course a very few sancho clause. The city and county leaders will go over this matter at their next meeting.

Yesterday a special barrio welcome wagon committee set out to see how many cats and cat lovers live in the hood. The findings were amazing and were more than what we thought we would find. The results of this study won’t be release till 2021.

Several members of our barrio welcome wagon and 200 so call cat lovers that are still protecting her 200 cats have agreed in theory with the city and county to open and support a Animal Shelter under Tina’s name and help maintain her 200 or more cats. The leader of the barrio welcome wagon has mention that the whole nation can learn from this great tragedy, and save lots of money if the authority go along with helping establish this memorial center.

Ok raza got to go and have a great Tejano day.

barrio stock market report for 11152013

Barrio stock market report 11152013

Cchwnn.

 

Como estan big spenders I am Urbano Yosabatodo con this weeks barrio stock market report for this week. Let’s start con higher education. Chinga compadre if you y la comandre are planning to send junior y la hija to college well you better start saving for them. I have always wonder si mucha de la raza does save to send pancho y pancha too college?  I am more than sure that at least 99 percent have not.

 

But don’t worry there is always federal aid and state aid and of course si pancho or pancha are a chip off the old block its possible an academic scholarships and on and on. Wow, now tha’st heavy or not? But then there is always el tiya y el tiyo y el grandpa y grandma. And if you own you;ve own rancho them there those few cattle you have been saving for that rainy day…. All and all college education is not getting any cheaper. I am sure that there are lots of reports and studies to tell us on how inflation and our poor accounting skills don’t help in raising those kinds of funds to send them to seek a higher education.

 

Chinga  whatever happen to those days que a high school graduate was bad ass and you could still work en el rancho.

 

Now for that award will barrio stock market:

 

>Las tortillas were up from last week $1.35 a pack.

< cheap beer down from last week $4.52 a six pack.

>los tamales were up due to all the walking esta vato does which he calls inflantion $6.00 a dozen.

 

 

> la barbacoa de cabeza was up from last week $6.50 lb. Easy con el con la manteca..

>las empanadas were really up this week at $.79 cent each.

^los  taquitos were stable this week at $1.25 each coffee is extra.

 

Ok raza there you have it for today’s barrio stock market report for 11152013

hejola report for 11132013

Hejola report for 11132013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, tx. Hello again, well I am back con this today’s award winning barrio headline news, I am bill diaz, and now for the news:

Free standing public urinals are being proposed for 2008 in the hood.

Mistrial declared after barrio lawyer forgets argument.

And finally barrio man tasers la commadre mother in a family dispute.

It seems que Luis chapa had enough con la comadres grandmother after she gave her opinion on a matter that was none of her business. So Luis used a stun gun on the grandmother to keep her freaking mouth shut.  The constable cadena arrested Luis and is investigating it as a domestic assault. Charges are pending. La grandmother was not injured, and didn’t required any medical attention.

Things were going so good for lalo Martinez on trail for killing seven cats, two dogs, and a unlimited number of little squirrels . El abogado Juan pistolas was about to deliver his closing statement when he went brain dead, loses his train of thought in trying to defend lalo. The judge declared a mistrial in a murder case of little poor animals, after the defense lawyer said he couldn't continue his closing statement because he had lost his train of thought or just plan forgot. The judge also suggested that el abogado seek medical help at the st. pauls medical center.

It seems que more and more raza are getting busted in the hood for reveling themselves on public streets. A large number of barrio members attended a barrio meeting on how to solve this problem, especially at the corner of third and Wells Street.  The proposal is to put free standing public urinals near that corner. It seems que at the large number of drunken come from that area, which is along the popular night club scene.  The city and county fathers and mothers will look into this matter.

Well there you have it raza I am bill diaz an see you all later gator.

hejola report for 11122013

Hejolia report for 1112013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, tx. Now the man from Wisconsin dells, David Duran, once again como estan? Bill is on a vacation. But for now let’s get to our award winning barrio head line news:

Judge Casanova chases defendant,

Vato in hood killed by boomerang,

And barrio cheerleaders help catch thief, again, and credit to cross country team also.

It was reported que Gilbert Ramon age 43, allegedly Stole a bag of cigarettes from Lopez stop and shop store and ran away as fast as he could.  His escape route led him onto Barrio High School grounds, where the barrio cheerleading team was practicing.  He was tackled by about 30 female cheerleaders and 2 male cheerleaders and held Mr. Ramón until the barrio constable cadena could get there.

Just for the record, another  bunch of girls and boys have been given credit for helping catch a purse-snatcher last year.  It seem que esta vato grabbed a purse in the hood is not a good business to get into.  The  barrio’s girls' high school cross-country team came out of training and again happened to have run into this bunch of do good-erWitness say que they saw at least 35 girls dressed like cheerleaders chased the thief until he got scared and dropped the purse, but was later catch hiding in the alley.

 

Last week at Judge Casanova courtroom across the tracks, defendant Ernesto Quinones, managed to breaker free and dashed out the courtroom door upon being sentenced to 120 days in jail for violating previous drunken driving sentences, but Judge Casanova leaped from the judge's bench in hot pursuit, while his judicial robe Flapping behind him.  The judge pursued Quinines out of the building, down The street, and into a Lopez stop and shop, where a clerk and off duty barrio cop Capt Joe Brown captured him.  After bringing Quinines back to the courtroom, Judge Casanova tacked On nine more months.

And finally, folks sometime we buy stuff at garage sales and really don’t know what to do with them or use them. But in this case Tomas Tellez had just purchased a boomerangs, and was showing kids in the hood how it was thrown.  On one of his tries it seems que he didn’t see the boomerang come back and struck him on the head. Mr. teller was rushed to the hospital a died from his head wound later that evening.

Well folks I quess that’s how the ram flies,  I am David Duran.

barrio stock market report for 11082013

Barrio  stock market report for 11302007.                                                Cchwnn.                                                                                                                                                Kingsville,tx . ola como estan I  am Pancho Francisco lopez younger brother to urbano, who by the way got arrested yesterday evening. I really couldn’t understand what the hell he was talking about. I think he wanted us to bail him out. Anyhow le’ts get to our stock report for today.

 

Oh by the way everything went up due to the dallas cowboys playing last night. We got word que the prices on everything, I mean everything went up on price, I  mean everything.

 

                                               

Los taquitos up ten cents from last week, ended the week at $1.35 each coffee is extra.

Los  tamales are on a steady increase, which we noticed a few weeks ago, ended the week at $6.25 a dozen. And expected to reach $6.50 by the end of the year.

Las tortillas, also were up this week with an increase of at least 25 percent from last week, ended the week at $1.65 a pack of twelve.

la barbacoa de caberas remained stable, ended the week at $6.50 a lb.

Las empanadas are on a roll now , and their prices are sky high, las empanadas took an increase ending the week at $.78 each. Pesse hejola.

And that cheap beer getting cheap. Six pack ended the week at $3.67.

 

Barrio want ads:

 

Item #. 75846:  used bicycle for sale. Has no tires but a used rim. Make offer.

 

Item#56841: used women underwear for sale. All size, make offer for lot. Please note super g-stings. I bet size 43, easy.

 

Item #56243; let over easter rabbits and chickens for sale. Some in good health and other you decide. Make offer soon.

 

Item # 54216: use tires sale, have all size but need a few to get the ones we don’t have. We have to look around the hood. Do have or some special rim that we found at the corner of wells and third street.

Item #56584: used green bay packer shirts an caps for sale. 

Ok raza there you have it for today. You better watchout and you better not cry because sancho clause is coming tonight.