06262018

Hejola report  for 06262018

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,texas. Hello there my friends and what in world wide of sports are we doing today, I am Frankie tuxedo Zuniga con today’ award winning barrio headline news:

Some good news:

Yesterday we were told that several Tejano organizations have agreed to acknowledge gay Tejano artists. This is great news for the only Tejano bar “ two tons of Fun”.

Easy Bunny, the manager of this bar tells us now there they can bring in real Tejano music into their bar. Its great move we think. Now we can all  see our compadres y commadres getting down con few good polkas.. oh yea. Keep it gay vato.

 Increase of ice block on the move:

Keep it Cool, a new barrio ice making company is hitting it big this past few weeks, with their old fashion but new trend on keep cool this summer. The deal is that this company has re-cycle old fashion water cooler and has convert them into modern day air conditions with a catch to it. You have to add a block of ice, which keeps the air it blows cool. The owners tell us that that block of ice can last up to two or three hours. Now the plus behind this is that you can also water your yard with the melted ice. “ keep it cool” tell us that blocks of ice are going fast and are still at that give away price.

Barrio members prepare for a long hot summer.

We just informed que the complete Westside of our hood was in the edge of night? That means that if some of the barrio folks don’t make payments on their past electric bills the whole darn Westside might just get shut down, says el electric guy Ben Cases. Yes, he told us que some folks like that air conditioner but forget que some one got to pay for that luxury .

 Ok raza have a cool day and stay cool because if you aint cool you aint shit.

hejola report for 06252018

Hejola report for 06252018.

Cchwnn.

kingsvilleTexas. Hello again I am Francisco Delgado del Gaulle, con today’s award winning headline news:

Vato staggering along west Richard, local residents call constables office.
Earlier this morning a barrio resident living at the 300 west Richard st. call the constable cadena office wanting to report que a vato had just passed her home and he seemed to be staggering. Once the constable got there it seems que he had already spoken to this dude twice this evening. Constable cadena stated que he had already determined que esta vato was not intoxicated.

Homeless family asked to move, no camping allowed inside the city barrio limits.

A  police unit from across the tracks, stopped an inspected a car that was parked in a no parking zone. It seems que this people were napping in their car on third and wells street. Well somehow or another this car somehow qualified as a campers the police report indicated. And since this side of town had already passed a new municipal code, outlawing no camping in the hood. The people were asked to move on or be hauled and tow to jail.

La commadre de la commadre hit by truck. 

Last night los vatos locos volunteer firefighters were called on an 811 call. Its seems que la commadre Susana, call 811 after her commadre GIGI got hit by a passing truck while she stood in the middle of the street. Before the vatos could get there it seems que la commadre managed to get up and she got her self-checked into the hospital. But before constable cadena could get there, it seems que la commadre had already checked herself out of the hospital. The constable report stated que the truck was not damage.



Thank you Francisco. Well there you have it for today, I am bill diaz, and have a great day.

hejola report for 062228

Hejola report for 06222018.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

First grade teacher visits former student.

Trickle down economic is part of everyday thing in the hood.

And now some darn good news.

Well the vato loco’s volunteer firefighters have agreed with the city and the county que they won’t be drinking, smoking, cussing, stealing, robbing, lying, back stabling, punching, hitting, kicking, biting, and talking chit to any body for the rest of the year, and also promise to keep their eyes open and ears clean just in case there is a fire and they have to call someone. Good luck loco’s.

What is the big deal with this trickle-down economics now a days? Did you know that this has always been a part of living in the hood and we can give you several examples. Why is it that in large families all the younger members of that family wear hand me down clothing, trickle-down economics. Why is it that we never throw stuff away, because we might need to have it later, trickle-down economics. Garage sales, front yard sales, back yard sales, moving sales, yard sales, and whatever you want to call them, are considered trickle-down economics. All and all we know what trickle- down economics really means. 

It seems que Don Pedro Ramirez just turned 85 years old was real surprise to see his first grade teacher at the party. Maria Gonzales now 103 years old was very excited to see que Don Pedro grew up a very handsome young man and did something with his life. It’s been more than 70^th years since I had last seen him, and he sure has changed a bit. But I am so glad que he made it out of first grade, says Mrs. Gonzales.

Ok raza have a great Tejano day.

westside warrior news network for 06192018

Westside warrior news network for 06192018.
Cchwnn. 
Kingsville,tx Hello again folks is Lewis mojo Lewis with our award winning barrio headline news: 
Barrio sancho clause shot, 
Barrio street light are not working, 
And finally barrio lotto leaders arrested. 
It seems that if things could go wrong, they will. Well that is the issue con our barrio lotto, I am sure many were hoping to get a chance on winning or getting some free bucks from our barrio lotto, well it’s not going to happen. Late last night real county cops and city police along con el constable cadena busted Manuel Vela the acting director for the barrio lotto on charges of steal barrio funds, Spending barrio funds, misleading board of directors for lotto, and losing almost all the lotto funds on gambling, and traveling charges with no proof he went anywhere, and buying personal stuff. His court hearing is pending. 
In the last twelve days there has not been one single barrio street light working starting from the Westside along the north bound railroad tracks, all the way down third street up to the corner of Richard street and down towards 6 th street. City official from across the tracks have told Westside resident that local taxes and other stuff is suppose to pay for such city services but since no one on our side of the tracks have not paid their yearly taxes, the city took it on their own to shut all city street light power off until some folks down here pay up. 
And finally, our man sancho clause was shot three times late last night when somebody was trying to car jack his home made look alike santa clause sled which he welded onto his 1979 ford whatever. His conditions are not known at this time but our constable cadena is asking for your help, if anyone has seen or heard anything dealing with this matter please contact us.. 
Ok raza there you have and have a great tejano day.

hejola report for 06182018

Hejola report for 06182018.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,texas. Hello again I am bill diaz con our award winning barrio headline news;

Barrio fails again:

After several time trying to killing herself, la commadre who suffers from depression, was arrested for walking naked and leaped from her first floor apartment trying to commit suicide, but failed again. She was hospitalized and send across the track to lalala land for observation.

Barrio latest rights;

Last week a jury acquitted drunk-driving defendant Mario Ocha after a judge accepted his argument that incriminating statement he made at the scene not be used against him because he was drunk and he didn’t know what he was doing when he waived his Miranda right!

And finally esta vato not well:

It seems that Juanito Bueno, 45, chopped off his arm at the elbow with a homemade guillotine a few days ago, but the barrio authorities found the arm in his refrigerator and made plans for reattachment surgery. However Bueno refused the surgery and threatened to sue and promise to chop the arm right back off if it were reattached! He was arrested and send to lalala land across the tracks.

Ok raza how crazy can the hood get? Bad…

hejola report for 06152018

Hejola report for 06152019.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,Texas. Hi I am Johnnie el quemon con todays award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio homeowner battles household pests;

Pancho Gonzales has been fighting his household pests now for ten years and finally got and edge on them, well maybe. In trying to outsmart them he created another problem, that was squirrels and bees. This week he tried to smoke all of them out by using an old army smoke bomb, in which badly damaged his unit and his neighbors. Please note that barrio volunteer firefighters had to rip open the roof in both units to battle the blaze. Now just yesterday he was still determine to get even with them bees and those squirrels that he went to another part of the unit and set it on fire trying to get rid of the beehive that wasn’t harmed from the first incident by using brake fluid and a cigarette lighter that start a major fire that finally burned down the whole apartment complex, charges are pending.

Westside educator resigns;

Westside school principal Marcos Lopez resigned yesterday following false earnings of $90,000a year, swore on the federal forms that she made just $25000—so that her own two children would qualify for reduce-price school lunches.

Know the fine points of the law ;

In a pre-trial motion at a barrio justice of the peace case in May, the defense lawyer for Cheap Motors Inc., which is being sued over car repairs, complained about plaintiffs' lawyers' unusual decision to permit a female paralegal to sit at their courtroom table, especially since she is a "large-breasted woman." Her "sole purpose" at the table, lamented defense lawyer Thomas Garcia, was "to draw the attention of the jury," presumably in favor of the plaintiffs. Garica later told this that he was concerned only with her "qualifications" to sit at the table.

 And finally school officical ends tradional birthday ritual!

- Principal Terry Esparza apologized to parents and children at Westside Middle School on our side of the tracks, in May and promised to stop his ritual "whammies," in which he summons kids on their birthdays to his office, sings "Happy Birthday" to them, and ceremonially spanks the child's backside with a cushioned hockey stick (with the number of whacks equaling the child's age).

Well raza have a great weekend.

hejola report for 0613,2018

Hejola report for 6/13/ 2018.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,Texas. Hello again I am Maria la Vandia con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio seniors busted !

El senor age 82 y la seniora 78 Gomez were arrested for marijuana growing operation that netted an estimated $45,000 a year insisted to a barrio jury this past week that their massive haul was not for sale but for personal use-in that they worship the Hindu God Shiva and truly believed that the world would end soon and that that they needed a sizable offering to burn. Well somehow they were able to convince the jury and charges were dismissed but the couple still has to pay taxes on their cultivation activity.

Barrio man robbery and than arrested`

It seems that lying about things will eventually catch up with you, that was the case con Ramon Garica was seen with a head wound and complaining that he had been robbey by two men.  After el constable corroborated with a friend of his learned that Garica money had been carrying was the proceeds of his having robbed a credit union earlier that day. He was taken and treated at the St. Paul’s medical center for his wounds and then arrested.

And finally some lease competent criminals in the hood;

1.     Mario Jackson Perez,56, was arrested at the corner of wells and third street yesterday after he walked out of  Ben Over sport shop with $234 worth of merchandise he did not pay for. But the funny part was that moments earlier, he had filled out an application to work there and when the surveillance cameras exposed him, the owner called him in for an interview and that’s when constable Cadena made the arrest.

2.     Ester Mora, 45, was arrested after allegedly robbing the Barrio No credit union. While Ester was standing at the teller’s window another employee of the union saluted her (hi Ester) because he remembered her from April 4^th , when he had applied for a car loan.

Ok raza crime don’t pay. Have a great Tejano day,oh by the way where’s Joe ????

hejola report for 06122018

Hejola report for 06122018.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio man arrested con su pet monkey;

Juan Pistolas was arrested yesterday for speeding but what got him in trouble was his pet monkey. You see in the hood you are allowed to have some many cats and dogs and farm animals but not monkeys. He was arrested and charged with not having a license or permit to own that monkey in the hood! Oh an got a ticker for speeding.

Hector Lozano sues barrio drugstore:

Hector Lozano filed a law suit today against the only drugstore in the hood for a prescription for Viagra, that he claims he suffered genuine, servere mental injury and emotional harm after he took the pill. He said his whole life has been ruined and his wife left him also. He claims that if he wouldn’t have taken the pill life would be normal but since he has been taking them pills he has had an urge to have sex with anything and everything that walks. The case will be reviewed sometime in 2025.

And finally barrio dude order to move out of his parents home:

Daniel Perez age 55 was order by a judge that he had to pack his chit and move out of his parent home within the next five days or go to jail. It seems that his elderly parents just got tired him living there rent free and eating all their food. Look said the father that we don’t mine rising him but dang 55 years living with us you would think it’s time to move on. I think our boys have that illness called “ the empty nest syndrome feeling”. He got his eviction notice along with a week of food to find somewhere else to live .. we feel bad but dang.

Ok raza if you are still living at home, you need to get a life.

hejola report foe 06082018

Hejola report for 06082018.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,texas. Hello again I am bill diaz con today’s award winning headline news:

Barrio man found naked at the corner of third and wells:

Its seems que someone or some folks assaulted el compadre Juan Munoz and left him naked. After a few hours lying at the corner of third and wells someone called el constable to check it out... when el constable cadena got there he did find el compadre Munoz passed out and naked. Once he came around he told Cadena que some folks had assaulted him and took his money and clothing. Charges are pending.

Barrio city bus kicks man off the bus!

The barrio city bus was forced to make an emergency stop due to a passenger’s body odor. The bus driver Johnnie B Garza told us que he had to stop and kick the Gus Perez off the bus for his unbearable body odor. Look we don’t mine a person smelling a bit but dang this man caused some of the passengers to vomit and faint during his route from the stink that came from the unwashed man... no charges will be filed.

And finally a ton of onions found at the corner of third and wells:

El constable was called to the street corner where he found more than a ton of onions in the middle of the street. The constable told us que he really didn’t know where they came from but the public was invited to come and pick some of them before the city decides to haul them off. There was just one thing, you need to make sure that you cut around the onion and get rid of the middle part but besides all that they are good to eat. Charges are pending to see who owns them onions?

Ok raza that’s have some onions soup this weekend?

hejola report for 06072018

Hejola report for 06072018.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas> hello again I am bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio youth umpire busted at game:

Yesterday afternoon el compadre Juanito Bueno was arrested during a t-ball game when it was discovered que he was drinking a beer during the game. It seemed que Juanito found it too easy to pour beer in one of those water bottles, and he would take a drink in-between-innings. What broke the camel’s back was that a player took a sip of his water bottle and told the coach que it tasted kind of funny. Once the coach found out that it was not water they confronted him the ump and at the same time called the cops. Bueno was arrested, oh by the way he was not paid for the game!

Barrio youth baseball and softball season ends with a big ring of fire!

You all know that many folks always somehow have left over fireworks from either New Year’s or the fourth of July. Well la commadre found it too easy make her own fireworks display to make the ending season exciting! Well she sure did, what she did was put several thousands of fire-crackers in a barrel with a small amount of gasoline, and some smoke bombs, bottle rockets, and so on. Well when she yelled at the group of folks at the closing ceremonies heads up and let it rip and she threw a match into the homemade bomb(lol). Now here is where the big problem started not realize that the county had a banned on any kind of open fires. Well not realizing that the fireworks were so out of control que it started a grass fire that spread into some homes that spread into the small shopping mall. To make a long story short charges will be filed.

And finally local folks are honored and dishonor all in the same day!

Ben Johnson Corpus was honored for his donation of $4000 to the league but later that day was arrested for dealing in drugs. The league official found it kinda  weird  when Mr. Corpus made his donation in all $20 dollar bills.  The league will decide to either keep the money or give it back for his bail!

Ok raza folks just cant do a good things now a days, and have a great day and god bless Jimmey Gonzales.

hejola report for 06062018

Hejola report for 06062018.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio sex education teacher in big trouble.

Maria Shine Gamez arrested inside constable car.

And two vatos arrested at only barrio Chinese restaurant.

It was just a class project say Francis Lopez a sex education teacher for el barrio school after she gave her students an assignment for extra- credits. The project was to rummage through their parents’ bedroom looking for sex toys and bring a selfie holding one. Some parents contacted the school about this odd project but the school Administrator told the parents it was not a part of the course requirement but was not sure how many students actually presented the show and tell project in class.

Maria Shine Gamez was arrested late last night and charged her with breaking into one of el constable unmarked cruisers. It seems that she was discovered by el constable around  4:00am after she had locked herself inside and could not figure out how to unlock the door worked.

And finally, Sonny junior and Sonny the third were both sentences to 5 months after they both pleaded guilty when they were caught inside the only Chinese restaurant “eat my Tong” walk-in freezer attempting to steal all the egg rolls. El constable tells us that there was no doubt que estos ways would have frozen to death if not for being spotted by one of the workers of the restaurant.

Ok raza make sure that you go and eat my tong and have a great Tejano day.

hejola report for06012018

Hejola report for 06012018.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,tx. Hello again I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:
Barrio dog trainer busted for stealing dogs.
Increase of stray animals in the increases.
And finally real love turns out to be your pet.

Before his arrest this past few days,“here Boy” Munoz, the only barrio dog trainer, show casted his new book on training barrio dogs. The name of the book is “Helping Dogs help themselves”, was to be released in a few days. But for now the book signing date is pending on his release from jail. 

El constable cadena will be the main speaker at tonight community program where he will address the large number of dogs, cats and some farm animals that have strayed into the hood lately. Cadena tells us que tonight meeting will be very important, because he plans on submitting his proposal to decrease the number of stray’s in the hood. He was not ready to announce his plan till after the meeting and may be in the year 2033, when his plan will be finalized.

Yesterday evening el constable stopped a 1978, 2 door ford whatever and found at least 27 dogs inside the vehicle. The owner and driver of the car was the only barrio dog trainer “here boy” Munoz, and was arrested for driving with too many dogs. El constable told us que they weren’t sure how he was able to driving when he barely fit in the car. But after further investigation and questioning some of the dogs, it turned out that half of the dogs had been reported missing. One of the dogs told this reporter “ bark bark barkkekssl”. All the dogs were arrested and some were later released to their proper owners, the other were let loose and allowed to wonder into the darken streets. “Here Boy” was fined and was taken to the local lalal land clinic for observation that evening. 
Ok raza there you have it have a great day.