hejola report for 01072013

 

Hejola report for 01072013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello raza I am bill diaz con today’s award winning headline news:

 

Barrio man arrested for stealing.

Barrio hog farm found dead.

And finally, barrio woman arrested with a traffic sign embedded in her skull.

Chinga want to talk about some bad luck, last night el constable had to pulled over la senoria Maria Gonzales after she was seen driving erratically. Once she was stopped they noticed que a traffic sign was embedded in her skull after colliding with it a few blocks down the road.  The victim seemed to be intoxicated.

 

El constable reported to us this past weekend que el senor Marcos Garcia a barrio hog farmer remains were found Saturday morning on his property. The report said que base on the condition of his body that his hogs had gotten to him before he got to them. Charges will be filed against all ten hogs.

Last night Abel Gonzales a local bartender called el constable to report que someone had stolen his credit card from his car a few hours ago. Then called the constable back a few hours later to report que he was holding the person that had stolen his credit card at the bar. It seems que the robber was trying to use it at the bar he worked in.

Ok raza have a great Tejano day.

hejola report for 01022013

Hejola report for 01022013.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,tx. Hello raza and we are back from that three week vacation and sure glad its over. Now for our award winning barrio headline news:
Barrio falls into fiscal cliff for 2033.
New Year’s first 33 babies.
And finally new year’s resolution, again.
As we have stated for the past 9 years that if you are not honest with yourself you should not even plan on... making such a promise. Now if you want to feel good and what to make some changes in your life you might want to concern lent, now lent is only for 40 days and nights. Now that more realistic.

It was a recording setting event this pasted Monday as the clock clicked 12 midnight bringing in the New Year. At least 25 families held their ground on trying to be honor as giving birth to the first child in 2013. But the funny party is that all this families held tight until the midnight, than 33 babies were declared as first born in the county. The prize of $100, will be divided by the 25 families. Alright raza.

Barrio members are preparing themselves for the worse to come in 2013. After barrio and city and county and state leaders failed to act on a budget resolution has force barrio members to dig deep into their savings. In addition some barrio members are eating their reserves food saved for harder times. Some barrio members are hurting real bad and might be forces to eat their pets, family members and stop drinking and smoking and other odd things barrio members do.
Ok raza have a great day and god bless America

hejola report for 01032013.

Hejola report for 01032013.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville,tx. Hello raza I am David Duran con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Barrio prepares for new text messaging services.

Vato gets arrested for arm robbery.

 And some bad news, the first death of the year reported last night.

David Little was shot to death last night when he took a break from a friendly game of chess on the third floor balcony around 1 a.m. and decided to urinated over the rail. Well, unfortunately,  Billy Henderson Garcia was walking below, and yelled, yo ! hey, what the heck, and pulled his small homemade 3 d gun and fired several gunshots, killing the urinator. Charges will be filed against Garcia.

 

This morning, Juan Gomez was sentenced to 33 days in jail for having robbed an armored car guard back in July of 2012. Juan made off with guard’s cashbox, but since he robbed the guard on his way into the bank and not on his way out, the cashbox contained no money.  Juan will do hard labor during those 33 days.

 

Yesterday brought in a brand new text message services for barrio members. This service will notify a customer if his or her love mate is trying to leave them. The service will be available only for married persons, and will display the where about of them 24 hours. How they find out who knows says a new customer, whose name we won’t mention ( Benny) but says he is glad with this new services since he has been married three times. The text message services will only cost you $95.95 a month.  

Ok raza have a great Tejano day.