barrio headline news for 02252020

Hejola report for 02242011/2020.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,tx. Hello again I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news:

Ten chickens and five turkeys found.

Junior high large crow mascot shot died.

And finally school cafeteria being investigated.

Yesterday school district official visited el Centro for education school cafeteria after charges were filed against some of its cooks for substituting power eggs for real eggs on their school menu. The report tell us que the cooks at the centro cafeteria had been taking home large number of eggs on a daily bases, claiming que they weren’t any good or were egg shells. But it turned out que while trying to dump them in the trash, several relatives of them workers were waiting to pick up the load of eggs and rush them home to real sale to local chain stores go and stop. Charges are pending and it might take up too several days to determine who was on this scam.

A well known local gun smith and a sharp shooter, Benny Mayo, was demonstrating his gun skills to a group of special ed. children when his gun went off accidently and killed the school mascot, the largest Crow ever seen in this parts of the world. It so happen que the crow was sitting in the corner of the class room when the gun went off, shooting the crow’s head off. No children were injured, but a large number of teachers and the school nurse tired to super glue the crow’s head back on to no prevail. School official are determining if charges should be filed again Mr. Torres, or just ask him to replace that crow. I guess they didn’t have vato super glue. Oh well.

In other news,The constable is asking for your help in determining who this chickens and turkeys belong to. The constable told us que he came across them late last night and it took him about one hour to either gather them together or just plain run over them with his car. He told que the these poor little animals were kind of seriously hurt but some might be able to half survived the running over. Please contact our office If you have any information about them.
Ok raza there you have it and have a great tejano day.

barrio headline news for 02242020

Hejola report for 02252015./02242020.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville,texas.
Hello again raza I am General Fido Vermcille con today's award winning barrio headline news:

Pelons arrested after attacking Maria La Bandia....

Protest continue on behave of los tamales.

And now some darn good news.
Now that violence has come to our hood many are preparing for the worse. We ask everyone and everything to take time and hug those Tejanos that have spent a life time keeping la onda alive and not burning all the bridges that had been built. We can stand together but we are not going to fall for it.
It seems that as of today there has been an overwhelming responds to the call for a new tamale war and not to give in to those that want us not to make tamales at home. As you might recall the tamale war of 1998 has really not changed anything but some folks have taken the lead on their own calling awareness about the possibility of them folks passing that law that would not let folks make tamales at home. This law was tabled in a meeting back then and was to be reviewed in 2015, well guess what? Its 2015! But a barrio city leader tells us que es puro pedo con todo esto and que those que are causing all this dusty don’t know what they are talking about. It’ like everything else, when you don’t have a clue you start chit and see who steps on it.

Yesterday afternoon around that time Maria la Bandia a cchwnn correspondent was brutally attack outside our command post. It was reported que several women that had shaved their heads in support of new Tejano make believe artist who had just signed recording contract con Pelon records, felt que she was not being fair con los pelons and wanted to show the whole world that there is nothing wrong wanting to look like esa vato Pit Bull. Charges will be filed against Juanita La Pelon, crystal La Pelon, Maria La Pelon and their grandmother Martha La Pelon. All the pelons turns out to be related to the owners of Pelon records.

Ok raza keep the faith and hug a Tejano, regardless que tan pedijos son

barrio headline news for 02192020

Barrio headline news for 02192020.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am bill diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news;

Barrio crack down on septic system:

El barrio own outlaws named Janet and John Lomas finally agreed last week to upgrade their barrio/farm's septic system inside the hood. Until then, the couple had ignored numerous inspections, constable visits and court orders even though a new system had already been paid for (by escrow funds left by the owner who sold them the farm). The Lomas' inspiring principle throughout the six years of living with failed plumbing was to challenge the county for its "inconsistent" enforcement of septic upgrades.

Barrio pig farmer protest;

Barrio pig farmer Pete Roy Rogers Munoz, 72, is embroiled in a long-standing dispute with the Lomas and Barrio leaders over who has the responsibility for repairing the sewage system on his farm just five feet from the barrio city limits, but has taken a more hardcore approach than the Lomas. He has saved his sewage in oil barrels stored on his property (now numbering about 100) to the outrage of neighbors, barrio members and barrio leaders. Roy has also periodically stepped up his protests to include leaving full barrels around town and some were found at the corner of third and wells.

 And finally common sense takes a vacation;

(1) Three barrio relatives were convicted yesterday of having convinced "numerous" customers to buy 3-inch-by-4-inch laminated "diplomat" cards that, promoters said, would legally free them from ever having to pay taxes or being arrested for any crime. According to el constable, customers ponied up fees ranging from $450 to $2,000 to get the cards.

(2) Dr. Bola-puro-pedo, a wealthy, respected physician, gave up his career in 1991 and gave away all of his possessions, coming under the spell of a barrio guru Maria Shine spiritual healing center located at the corner of third and wells alley. Dr. Bola-puro-pedo filed a lawsuit to recover his wealth, Puro-Pedo said that despite being an educated professional, he did not realize what he had done until 2003 because he had been brainwashed ("unduly influenced") by the aged guru. It is predicted that barrio judge will tossed out his lawsuit.

Ok raza go out and  vote ….

barrio headline news for 02142020

Barrio headline news for 02142020.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello Raza have a great VD, oopps I Mean have a great Valentes day and now for our award winning barrio headline news:

VD day gives the wrong message;

Some folks in the hood were real pissed off at Maria Villa for her posting in her barrio page wishing all those with VD to have a great day and spread the love. So folks didn’t find it too fun and filled a complaint about such an ugly wish. Investigation is still under way.

(An STD may also be called a sexually transmitted infection (STI) or venereal disease (VD).).

Barrio hay day;

El barrio leader Tomas trumps said que our economic is doing so good that he is going cancel this year’s .5 percent pay increase for all barrio workers. Look he said we have too darn good to ruin it by giving employees a raise. You don’t want to spoil them. At one point he said we might just be paying people too much already!

Pinto bean recall;

Last night at the barrio bingo house the public announcer told players that they should not be taking the pinto beans used to cover their bingo numbers home, due to the increase price this year. Pinto beans were reasonable at one time but time has changed. And if we don’t monitor them we will have to charge a lot more to play bingo.

Drunks, cracks and hoes warning;

Our constable again told us que we are trying to crack down on all those things that make our hood awful to live in; starting with a shit load of drunks both males and females and in some cases domestic animals and farm animals. In addition to all this, the cracks in the street and all those hoes in the street will be repaired sometime in year 2025. Keep the faith and avoid those areas that have seen such an increase.

And finally some folks go through a lot of trouble;

La commadre Maria La Shorty, went to a lot of trouble to enter the only barrio cigarette cheaper store somewhere down third and Wells street last week. Based on the constable report she bored a hole in the ceiling, gaining access from a vacant building above the cigarette store. The constable told us que it probably took a couple of hours to do this. Once in the store Shorty tripped an alarm inside the store, and she panicked and tried to escape back up the through the hole but ended up falling through the ceiling into a storage room, all of which was caught on surveillance video. It seems that for all her effort, Shorty came away with just a bag of rolling tobacco and a few bottles of energy drinks, said el constable, but she caused thousands of dollars’ worth of damage.  Just for the record, Shorty was already on probation, was charged with burglary and conspiracy to commit a crime. El constable is still looking for that farm animal that he said was an accomplice to this crime. Dang.

Ok Raza have a great V-D day.

barrio headline news for 02132020.

Barrio headline news 02132020.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again raza how are we doing, I am Bill Diaz con today’s award winning barrio headline news;

Fetishes about hair;

-- In December el compadre John O. Salinas, 53, was sentenced to 45 days in jail for cutting off 30 strands of a commadre ponytail at the corner of third and wells street in Janurary  (after being rebuffed in his offer to purchase the locks). He apologized for his "urges about hair" and vowed to get counseling.

Sock problems and issuses;

For some weird reason socks have been a big issue lately;

- Last week  David Little  was sentenced to a year in jail for telephone harassment, specifically, calling people up and asking them if their feet stink. According to his barrio lawyer, Donathon "realizes what he does is wrong, but he is unable to stop himself."

- And two weeks ago James Brown Ortiz, 27, was sentenced to six years in prison for his second offense of entering women's homes and stealing their socks.

- And two days ago a 28-year-old man was charged with harassment and assault of four women with whom he struck up conversations on the street and whose feet he eventually forcibly fondled. According to one victim, "(The man's) eyes rolled back in his head like he was really excited." A big public notice has been posted all over town that we will not tolerate such action.

And finally some odd behavior;

-La compadre Ray Garza was charged with shooting his sister (leaving her paralyzed below the waist) because she beat him in a wrestling match.

-Deena Martinez, 52, a barrio school teacher, was charged with choking a fourth-grade boy because he sneaked a peak at her grade book.

Ok raza just remember be happy.

barrio headline news for 02112020

Barrio headline news for02112020.

Cchwnn.

Kingsville, Texas. Hello again I am Bill Diaz today’s award winning barrio headline news;

Barrio leader continuous firing unfaithful folks;

Yesterday around 10 animals, and 10 domestic animals, and 10 men and women got their little red card notice and were terminated from a work program the daughter of Barrio Tomas Trumpa, Elly May had hired under her little “I’m a Princess program”. I’m a Princess Program is a program to hired barrio folks to run all kind of daily chores for theTrumpas family. The program is funded from the taxes the hood has been charging to allow farm animals living in the hood. The firing came are this evil animals, domestic evil animals, and evil men and evil women protested some of the fringe benefits that were going to be cut by his 2020 barrio budget, says Barrio Leader.

Elly May Trumpas arrested and released;

Late last night a complaint call came in to report a lot of noise was coming from one of Trumpas family members around 4 a.m. Once the constable got there they arrested several half naked people walking around outside the Redneck Bar Trailer park owned by Elly May Trumpas. After a few minutes talking to some of the naked folks everyone was released and no charges will be filed. It seems that there was a miss understand from one of the women walking around naked and seemed to clear the matter up. At this point we are not sure what was cleared up but it did make sense in a sense but no sense at all.

And finally reduction of aid to barrio rick people’

You would think people that make a lot more money than you and me, would be glad to share some of the wealth with barrio members, but that didn’t seem to go well once these rick folks heard they were not going to be able to apply for food stamps or any kind of freed aid this coming year. So even when as far as accusing Trumpas as being unfair to the rick and more in favor of the poor. But a few rich folks told us that maybe California is the place we out to be.

Ok Raza have a great day,