hejola report for 09072011

Hejola report for 09072011.
Cchwnn.
Kingsville, Tx, hello raza como estan I am Bill Diaz, back from a long holiday, but for now let’s get to that award winning barrio headline news:
Cat owner owned by cat.
Barrio man victim of medical exam.
And finally barrio resident turns himself in.
Yesterday during the day, Daniel Ruiz, turned himself in after authorities released a surveillance tape of a break in and vandalism at the corner bar off third and wells street. The camera showed a large man, breaking into the tavern. Mr. Ruiz, a big man confessed to going on a drunken prowl with his friends, but said only remembered the break in only when he saw the video and recognized his distinctive image from the back, including several inches of his butt crack.
Sometime around noon el senor Mr. John Mora, entered el constable cadena’s office to report que he had been victimized by a barrio medical exam, which was conducted in back of a 1978 ford stationwagon, By a lone doctor wearing a white lab coat. Mr. Mora claims que this Lone doctor used toothpicks for acupuncture pressure points, and who was prescribed a container of dietary pills with an expiration date of Feb.2000. He claims that he paid $75.00 for the treatment and is not sure he got his money’s worth. The constable will investigate this matter.
And finally, la commadre Maryland Ocha was taken too el barrio st. paul’s medical center by los vato locos’ volunteer fire fighters for treatment after she lose the fight with her house cat. Ms.Ocha who was armed with a 12inch butcher knife took on the angry beast. But somehow the attacking cat caused her to lose her balance and fell on the 12 inch blade. No charge will be filed against the cat.
Ok raza have a great tejano day.